The Beauty Within
It's not easy in today's society to truly feel beautiful. We as women are bombarded everywhere we turn by images and voices telling us we are imperfect creatures. Millions of dollars are made by various companies and advertisers telling us WE can achieve perfection via the purchase of some "beauty" product; eating or NOT eating certain foods, exercising with this piece of equipment or that one, camouflaging or uncovering certain body parts...Lord, it never ends.
Unfortunately, for a vast number of women we 'buy' into it, literally. We spend dollar after dollar on cosmetic products that one by one pile up in our "make-up" drawer, exercise videos and exercise equipment by one 'perfect' physical specimen after another (who because of our hard-earned money can now afford liposuction), chemical processes and extensions in our hair to achieve the most "flattering' styles, we offer bodies up to the sacrificial alter of beauty to be plucked, waxed, shaved , exfoliated, nipped, tucked and for what? So we can continue to chase the always unattainable beauty ideal?
Don't get me wrong, I prefer to shave my legs, I wear nail polish and lipstick and make-up (when I know I'm going somewhere groovier than the grocery store), and I don't wear socks with sandals. But I'd like to think that if one day I awoke and couldn't wear one cosmetic product, relax my ethnic hair or lose that extra 5 lbs; I would know that I was still a beautiful woman. And extraneous physical accouterment's aside, I would not cease to be a lovely unique human being.
This is what concerns me now that I have a daughter. I look into the future and dread the day when she will come home crying (as many kids do) because someone at school told her she was ugly. As we all know kids can be cruel and most times they are repeating the things they hear and learn at home.
I would like to be able to not just tell her with my loving words but also show her by my life example that she is a beautiful girl. I want her to see that she is beautiful; not because of what she wears on her body, applies to her face or hair or by how much she weighs. I want my daughter to grow up with the knowledge that true beauty is what comes from inside and radiates outside in the acts of kindness and consideration you give to others, the way you love and respect yourself, the joy you take in sharing time with family and friends, and the sacrifices you make so that others can be happy. True beauty is loving yourself no matter what your shade, size, financial or educational situation. I hope as she grows up in this increasingly appearance obsessed world, that she can pass every reflection of herself with a smile of security and peace. I am only just reaching that place myself.
It has taken me many years of spending and self-doubt to finally realize that you cannot find in a bottle that which can only come from within.
Written by Felica D. DLP
How To Manifest Miracles Now
The universe is nothing but a big bowl of energy. Energy that attracts and repels. That is how dreams are either manifested or avoided. To better illustrate this concept, imagine carrying a walkie-talkie.
Al though two people can be miles and miles apart, they can still talk to each other. How can that be, since there is no connection between one another? The illusion is that they are separated, however, the truth is, they are still connected invisibly by a stream of energy.
Depending on the strength of the frequency, the louder and clear they can communicate with one another. That is assuming that both are communicating on the same channel. Life operates the same way. When we have a desire, we are sending a frequency to the universe, and the universe response to us immediately.
Most people would argue that their requests are not being granted. The truth is, that each request is always granted, what they don't seem to understand is that their request is either not clear, or that they may be operating on a different channel, or frequency. You may ask, how could that be? Simple.
On a conscious level we send our request. On a unconscious level we decide which channel we are communicating on. For example, "more money" might be set on channel 3. So consciously people would be broadcasting, "I desire more money." The challenge is, they are broadcasting it on channel 5.
That being the case, what governs the channels unconsciously? Our beliefs. The universe is always giving you that which you "believe" you deserve, not that which you desire. When what you desire and what you believe are the same, the universe will manifested it immediately? Why, because all you need to do is ask, and you shall receive.
So how do we change our channels unconsciously so that it will match our request? The same way we created them. We created our beliefs by using life experiences that we attached a meaning to. For example, we asked someone to dance and the person said no. The truth, is, there are many reasons why that person said no. It could be that she/he had a partner, or that she/he was shy. Who knows, she/he may really wanted to dance with you but was embarrassed. Notice that the reasons had nothing to do with you. However, most people take things personally or just add their own story.
In this case, since the person might have felt rejected, he/she might have thought that there was something wrong with him/her. And since the feeling was not pleasant, the person uses that as a reference point which stops him/her for asking someone else to dance.
So later on, he/she wants a loving relationship which can be broadcast on channel 7, however, his/her beliefs operates on channel 2 which avoids relationships for fear of being hurt.
So to change that belief the person would need to change the channel to let's say 4 which might be, "giving a chance to just meet someone." Once they see how the universe brings someone into their space, use that as reference for future request. That way a new belief is being cultivated so in the future, that person is operating on a frequency that is more consistent with the frequency he/she is broadcasting consciously.
That is why the rich gets richer because once they have attuned themselves to the frequency of abundance, they simple keep attracting more of that abundance which solidify their belief. It becomes a never ending cycle.
And that is what the Manifest Mircacles Online Video Class teaches. How to align yourself into that space where you become a miracle maker.
Letting Go Of Perfection
"The power of discovery enables us to achieve excellence without having to be "perfect.'"
- Thomas Crum, The Magic of Conflict
I arrived at the conference center ready to present my workshop. Almost immediately I noticed the room was too small and it was not set up as requested. There were no flipcharts and there were tables, though I had specifically asked for open space. I caught myself and smiled. I drew the word D I S C O V E R Y in large letters on a piece of newsprint and put it at the front of the room as a reminder.
One of my favorite words, the concept of Discovery excites the brain, conjures up lost treasure, desert islands, new inventions, and old relics, something that was - up to now - unknown. Explorers discover new lands, scientists discover cures for diseases, and philosophers seek to discover the truth.
What about discovering each other? Learning what is new and important in each of our neighbors, friends, family, colleagues; what has been lost in the daily grind of work; truths, values, and hopes that are yet to be revealed? Discovery. A lovely word.
I first came to appreciate Discovery in The Magic of Conflict, where Thomas Crum describes it as a magical domain that "allows us to move beyond the fight, beyond success, to an open realm of possibility." When we're in Discovery mode, we are spontaneous, curious, fascinated, and appreciative of life in all its diversity.
Young children live in Discovery and sometimes we do. Katharine Hepburn lived a life of stardom but never lost her childlike fascination with people and life. Thomas Edison's famous quotation after many attempts at inventing the light bulb shows a person in Discovery mode: "I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work!"
What's the opposite of Discovery? Perfection - a place with which we're all too familiar. In Perfection, things have to be done right, we have to look good, get good grades, and win the games we play. Our standards are high, and failure is to be avoided at all costs. In daily conflicts, sometimes at the expense of our dearest relationships, we have to prevail. When we feel attacked we fight back, sometimes with our own hurtful words, or with behavior calculated to control, manipulate and diminish.
According to Tom Crum, when we shift into Discovery, we treat mistakes as outcomes and conflicts as opportunities to learn and understand more of the world and our partners. We stop being afraid to fail because there is no failure, only increased awareness and experience. We enter a world of wonder, spontaneity, and fun.
What Can I Learn Here?
We shift into Discovery, not with judgment, but with awareness - by moving from "How can I be right about this?" to: "What can I learn here?"
When I'm angry because I just missed a three-foot putt, Discovery changes self-judgment into an opportunity for learning.
In the middle of a tough meeting with your department manager, try asking yourself - "What can I learn here?" What is it about this issue that's important to each of us?
Upon arriving home, you find your life partner upset.Your first reaction is that it's something you did. But wait! "What can I learn here?" jumps into your thoughts, and you ask: "Honey, you seem upset. Anything I can help with?" And you hear: "I'm just worried that I won't finish this new project they gave me at work in time."
Or your teenager is exhibiting new habits that have you worried. It's worth checking out what the worldview is from her perspective before reaching a judgment.
We've all experienced moments of Discovery when we break through to a new understanding. It's a powerful place that we like and want to revisit. The challenge is to choose to go there on purpose, especially in difficult situations. Katharine Hepburn has been quoted as saying, "Wouldn't it be great if people could get to live suddenly as often as they die suddenly?" Shifting from perfection to Discovery is the way. Try it. Discover for yourself.
The Biggest Secret
I'm going to share a secret with you now, so just come a little bit closer.
It's a big secret and I'm going to have to ask you to not tell anyone though, please. I know I can trust you on this.
The thing is, if you did tell anyone, particularly a therapist you might shatter their ego and perhaps they are not as ready as you are to be let in on this little secret.
I do a lot of work one to one with people, and after a session, or some times later, they will say to me, "I can't believe you made me do ..." or "I can't believe you made me change ..."
And this is in spite of me telling them before a session, "I can't make you do anything you don't want to do, you are the one that does all the work here."
In fact, it's not just in therapy session, but it's in life you hear people say, "You made me ..."
You must have heard people saying it, "You made me drop that" "You made me lose that" "You made me feel that." I know I have. In fact, I know I have even said things like this, I probably still do on occasion!
See, as a therapist, I don't actually make you do anything. I can't make you do anything you don't want to do. If I could then I'd be retired by now as the most famous therapist on the planet!
I just act as a guide; a facilitator if you like, helping to get you to your chosen destination.
When you go on a car journey somewhere unfamiliar you take a map book right? (And yes, for our more modern and technically astute readers you may be using Satellite Navigation, but some of us still use maps, so just substitute Sat Nav for map here.:) )
Does the map book get you there?
No. It does not.
You use the map book and it guides you there. It tells you the route to take, but you actually get yourself there.
You could ditch the map and just go by gut instinct, but it'll probably take you much longer to get there, if you got there at all. And who knows where you would end up on route!
This is how it works with therapy sessions.
The therapist is the map, and you are the driver.
As a therapist, I use my skills, my knowledge and my experience to guide you safely through the quagmire to your chosen destination. You could make the journey yourself, and some people do, but it can take longer and be a much more treacherous route.
Of course, this doesn't just apply to therapists though; it can apply to any area of your life. You can use the knowledge and experience of experts to get you to your goal quicker.
If you take up a new hobby or sport, you don't tend to sit in a corner and try to work it all out yourself. You will normally go for lessons or at the very least get a book by an expert. When you start a new job, you are generally taught by an "expert"; someone who already knows the ropes.
In effect, you model the expert, learn how they do it and then do the same. Kids do it all the time. It's how they learn. Ever noticed how your kids always pick up those annoying habits from you; the ones you really didn't want them to have?
For modelling to be truly effective, instead of just copying what a person is doing, you must learn what is going on in their heads and copy that too. You need to understand their mental processes in order to effectively model their results.
If you are learning to break a wooden plank with your bare hands, it's no good thinking about your shopping list whilst going through the motions. You have to copy the mental processes and then you will shatter the wood.
Whatever your goals in life, use a "map book" to help you get there. Model an expert and your journey will be much easier and safer.
Knowing When I M Not 4 Suggestions For Developing A Strong Center
The more I practice centering, the more I realize that as important as it is to be able to identify and access the centered state, it is equally important to be able to know when I'm NOT centered. Otherwise, how do I choose?
When I'm centered I'm in control of my behavior. Centered action is on purpose and by choice. Uncentered action is reactive and out of control, and I end up looking back with regret.
I've spent a lot of time figuring out my personal symptoms of uncenteredness. Physically, my legs tense and knees lock; my jaw locks, my throat closes, and I stop breathing.
Mental and emotional symptoms vary, but I can become self-righteous, depressed, and very self-critical. Without warning, these reactive responses combine into a mind/body state that is powerful enough to overcome all my good intentions and noble purposes.
When something happens that triggers these physical and emotional states, I increasingly notice them at earlier stages. I can then ask myself if I want to go where they will carry me. Sometimes it's a difficult choice. These reactions are "practiced" and seductive. To choose to be centered means to integrate that energy in some new and more useful way in which I'm not as practiced.
This kind of awareness is learned and developed. And, speaking from experience, it can be done. Here's my path, and I urge you to add to it:
We have the power to achieve, create and change circumstances in our lives. We are born powerful. Our Creator did not leave us helpless, poor and weak. He gave us all the tools to not only survive but fulfill our destiny to the utmost. We are all born for a purpose. It does not matter where we came from or the circumstances of our birth, youth or present lifestyle.
Let us consider these Words:
"The Lord will perfect that which concerns me: your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; forsake not the works of your own hands." (Isaiah 138:8)
"I will praise you; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are thy works.. My substance was not hid from you, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes did see my substance, yet being imperfect; and in your book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.(Psalm 139:14-16)
"Thus says the Lord, thy Redeemer; the Holy One of Israel; I am the Lord thy God who teaches you to profit, who leads you by the way that you should go." (Isaiah 48:17)
These are just a few Words of Promise that you can stand on and act upon. The Bible is filled with them. Not only is God's Word better than the thoughts and words of great thinking and creative genius, it transforms people! Why? Because they penetrate the heart! They don't merely appeal to your intellect, emotions or common sense, like ordinary words. The Word of God is "Quick and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow (body), and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart." (Hebrews 4:12).
The Word of God is Truth, and the Truth will set you free. Freedom from fear, despair, suffering, and anxiety is the greatest gift you can get. It fills you with hope, love and faith which transforms into real Power..
Jesus is also called the Word of God. "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with of God, and the Word was God. (John 1:1) He came to give beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord. (Isaiah 61:3) Furthermore, to those who believe in Him He gives the power to become the sons of God. (John 1:12)
That amazing power is not just for us to read about in the Bible. That kind of supernatural power is available to each and every one of us, every moment of every day! God's truth allows you to experience His grace and His power. So, instead of solving your problems by your own minute power, allow me to encourage you to reach out and tap into God's Power. It's available for each one of us, smart or not, rich or poor, happy or miserable - any time we call upon His name.
A Gift Of Energy
"When attack becomes dance, everything is seen as a gift of energy."
That sounds great, doesn't it?
Couldn't we all use a little more energy from time to time? I know I could. Right now, for instance, as I sit with a blanket over my shoulders, sipping lemon tea and hoping that the next coughing spasm is not as ferocious as the last two, I could use a gift of energy. The tickle that started in my nose and chest a few days ago has blossomed into a full-blown, body-wracking cold, complete with chills and fever.
The martial art Aikido (The Way of Harmony) teaches us to see everything that comes our way as energy to be danced with. By centering and extending our ki (life energy) we connect and blend with the energy of attack, making it a part of us. We redirect it from center, keeping ourselves and our attacker safe from harm.
How this elegant metaphor applies to situations in our personal and professional lives is a continuing source of study and fascination for me. One of the ways I work at integrating Aiki principles into my life is by sharing the philosophy with others. My workshops use physical exercises which help our bodies remember how to do things like center, extend, acknowledge and blend. We begin to dance, flow and move with the energy of conflict instead of blocking it.
So I sit, wondering how I can dance with this attack. Even centering doesn't stop the incessant coughing. I have no ki to extend (it seems to have retreated to the innermost recesses of my system). The only thing I can think to do is to acknowledge and embrace.
But that, at least, is a beginning. In years past, I would not acknowledge being sick. When I was sick, I'd often go to work anyway. I plowed through what needed doing with half a spirit and wore myself out. I probably infected half a dozen others in the process. I was sometimes ill-tempered, depressed and depressing to be around. If I can't acknowledge what's going on, whether it's a cold or a problem at home, I surely can't embrace it. By this I mean make it a part of me, connect with it so that I can begin to look for solutions.
Most of our conflicts, internal or external, would resolve themselves if we would only take this first step - acknowledge them! But because we see them as negative, we immediately resist by fighting or fleeing. If I can see what comes my way as energy, with no positive or negative charge other than what I give it, I can be more curious about it. As unwanted as it may be, there's definitely more power in dancing with it than in resisting it.
As for my cold, I'm still trying to learn if there's a gift here somewhere. Let's see - I've already read a book I've been putting aside for months, started another, and gotten some much needed rest (in between coughs!). I may not always know what the energy offers, but when I can ask the question "Where's the gift?" I've taken a step in a new direction.
The Solution Within
It's quite amazing how many people go through their lives with very little thought as to where they are heading with it.
There is an accepted lifecycle assigned to everyone and most of us seem to just fall into it and 'live' it out as if there was no alternative.
There are some truly disturbing statistics about people's lives, most of it relates to their financial status at retirement time but I won't scare you with that, you can research it by yourself if you have not heard it all before. But what is even more disturbing is the quality and 'purposeless-ness' of their lives which is difficult to measure or put into statistics, yet is all around us.
I don't want to point fingers at anyone, all you have to do is look around and you'll see what I mean. I often look at people with drug and alcohol problems or even history of selfharm, suicide. I think it is getting worse and I just couldn't help myself from wondering why that is.
I don't claim to know all the reasons for it or be an expert in this field, however, I have a keen eye and lived enough, both in years and experience, to have found some of the common reasons why that is and what some of the solutions might be to this problem.
But the way I see it, one of the biggest problems is this lack of purpose people find in their lives. The other is the lack of time or, for one reason or another, commitment to finding out about it.
It is not easy to stop and look at one's life and it is even more difficult to face up to the reasons why someone's life may have no purpose or is 'in a mess'. The lack of unbiased, friendly and in some cases anonymous help make this even more difficult. I haven't done any research (yet) on how good free, anonymous phone-in help lines are. But I would not be surprised if they were very, very busy. I say this because of a personal experience I had as a young university student.
I had some problems in my life and thought there was no one I could talk to. So, after some struggle within myself I decided to drop in at the university's own counseling service. I'd explained that I had some problems I really needed to discuss with someone. They started asking my name, address, what course I was attending etc, etc, etc. Two minutes into this 'conversation' I thought to myself "hang on, I don't want to be a statistic, I just need someone to talk to... now." It was hard enough to come up with the courage and come to a complete stranger and own up that I do have a problem that I don't think I can solve on my own and need some else's help, let alone being quizzed about things which should not really matter, not just now anyway.
So, I promptly turned around and left without saying much. I don't think they'd kept my record, need to keep the paperwork down, you know... Anyway, I got myself an ice cream, two scoops just to be on the safe side and had a loooong walk in the city churning over thoughts after thoughts in my head. It was one of the worst and best days of my life. The worst because I realized I was only a number at the university and I did not get the help I needed so very much and I also realised I did not have anyone close enough to talk to about my problems. And the best because in the long walk I'd allowed myself some 'time-out'. Allowed myself to stop and think about what was happening to me, why I was having the problems I was so desperately seeking solution to and why I felt so alone. I'd found time enough to clear my head and find the solution from within... I can't remember what route I took, where I ended up walking to. But I can clearly remember every thought I had on that day and this was more than 20 years ago...
Since then I've learnt to rely more on my own abilities and realised that all solutions have to come from within. You are the only person who knows everything about yourself and this makes you the only person qualified to find the right solution for your problems. Sometimes it seems easier to try and find someone to help you, in a sense put the responsibility on them. But to be as blunt as I can, you are the only person to whom your problems matters the most. It is good and you should discuss things with others, use as them as sounding boards, source for inspiration and encouragement but at the end of the day you have to solve your problems from within. You have to look at your life and find a direction and purpose for it.
The Concept Of Positive Thinking
THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING
In todays world, more and more people speak about the power of positive thinking. It is a concept that has a very high view of human nature and ability. Its advocates teach that the human mind has the power to turn wishes into reality through optimism. In other words The Power Of Positive thinking refers to the power of creating thoughts, which create and focus energy into reality. To bring into creation a positive outcome, which you see as a benefit to yourself or others.
Positive thinking is a mental attitude that admits into the mind thoughts, words and images that are conductive to growth, expansion and success. It is a mental attitude that expects good and favourable results. A positive mind anticipates happiness, joy, health and a successful outcome of every situation and action. Whatever the mind expects, it finds. This is a powerful tool that everybody has, but a lot of people are not aware of it.
Positive thinking includes:
1. Our innate capability to produce desired outcomes with positive thoughts.
2. Having belief in possibilities even when the facts seem to indicate otherwise.
3. Making creative choices.
4. Meeting problems head on.
Concept of Positive Thinking Explained
Everything in the world of form is preceded by a thought. Thoughts are not in the world of form, form is not in the world of thought. But one actually precedes the other in all cases. If one wishes to affect form, one must work with cause, not effect. Thought is cause, form is effect. And when we work in the realm of thought, choosing a negative one or a positive one will influence the outcome.
Simply put, we live in a world of cause and effect i.e. for every cause there is an effect and every effect has to have a cause. Everything that happens in this world (form) is an effect, the cause being thoughts. These thoughts affect the whole universe. And each thought once generated and sent out becomes independent of the brain and mind and will live upon its own energy depending upon its intensity.
All of our feelings, beliefs and knowledge are based on our internal thoughts, both conscious and subconscious. We are in control, whether we know it or not. We can be positive or negative, enthusiastic or dull, active or passive. These attitudes are maintained by the inner conversations we constantly have with ourselves, both consciously and subconsciously.
Mystics have long held that we do, in fact, control our reality; not just the little things in life, but everything. We create our entire world by the way we think. Thoughts are the causes and conditions are the effects. Our circumstances and conditions are not dictated by the world outside; it is the world inside us that creates the outside. They have maintained that regardless of our circumstances, each person has the innate, Universe or God given ability to create or alter reality to our choosing. This is done by using the power of positive thinking. They say that we are not here to suffer or to live a life of misery but rather, each conflict or problem that we confront is merely an opportunity to express our higher selves, to evolve and to alter the circumstances to our liking. They claim that there is no such thing as a God who seeks to punish and that so called errors are merely opportunities to grow.
These concepts on the power of the positive thinking, once restricted to the initiated few, came to light in the so called New Age. Voices from people such as Ram Dass, Deepak Chopra, Joel Goldsmith, John Price, L. Ron Hubbard, Dr. Hew Len and countless others expressed the notion that reality is of our own making and choosing, regardless of appearances to the contrary. The basic premise is that our past conditioning should be re-evaluated and that we should consciously determine the way in which we wish to live. We should use the power of positive thinking to create things (reality) which are good for us and for others.
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