Tips For A Relaxing Wedding Day
Although a lot of wedding magazines and planning books will tell you that the bride needs to relax a lot on the wedding day, let's not forget about the groom either.
Ways to relax when you don't think that you can
The unfortunate part of getting married is that you will be pulled in many different directions on and leading up to the day. Not only will the planning seem to take up your free time, but family member may feel that they need to put in their two cents as well.
The combination can be torture.
But since you've gotten to the actual wedding day without major damage, why not have a little fun? For the women, have a little champagne at the salon when you get your hair done. Joke with your friends and laugh. This is supposed to be a joyous time. And really, anything that you would need to do at this point will be taken care of by someone else.
You just need to get dressed and to the church.
And for the men, why not spend the morning at the golf course with some of your groomsmen? This is the perfect time for you to kick back before you have to get ready. Since getting ready won't be nearly as complicated as your soon-to-bride, why not sleep in too?
Other ideas to relax on your wedding day include joking (at non-serious times) a lot and smiling as much as you can. Funny enough, just the act of smiling triggers a reaction in your brain to relax. Seriously.
Passing the buck
A lot of letting you relax on your wedding day does come down to good planning. If you've delegated and thought of everything, there's no need to worry and you can enjoy the moments as they come.
If something should go wrong (and honestly, something will), don't worry too much about it. Your wedding party and family will want to make sure everything goes smoothly, so if something should happen, enlist one of them to take care of the problem.
This is your wedding day and you want to look happy in your pictures, rather than relieved. Take some time for yourself on the actual day. You can either step out of the room for a moment, or just sit down with a book for a few minutes. Find just five minutes of quiet, and you're sure to have a relaxing wedding day.
Marriage Counseling Prevent Therapist Assisted Marriage Suicide
People want to get married and stay married. In fact, according to a study by Family Service of America, more than 70% of adult Americans believe that "marriage is a lifelong commitment." Interestingly, even 81% of divorced and separated Americans still believe marriage should be for life. Yet, over half of marriages end in divorce.
Too often, even those couples seeking professional help do not receive the tools they need. As divorce became more socially accepted in the 1970's and 1980's, many therapists actual assist in marriage suicide by viewing divorce as a life style option or as a pathway to personal growth. Though well meaning, too often they advise clients to get a divorce stating without full knowledge of the enormous consequences of divorce. At best, they take a "marriage neutral" attitude of "what ever makes you happy," without knowledge of the current research on happiness.
Studies on divorce and happiness demonstrate that many divorced persons are actually less happy five years after the divorce. Couples you worked through their problems and avoided divorce tend to have higher levels of happiness after five years.
So why don't couples work harder to make their marriages work? Because they don't have the tools.
Barbara Bartlein, clinical psychotherapist and author of "Why Did I Marry You Anyway? 12.5 Strategies for a Happy Marriage," has developed a program to improve your relationship. You learn:
*How therapists doom marriages
*Why marriages are failing
*The #1 Myth that sabotages marital success
*Tools that assist clients in building trust and commitment
*Strategies to build long term relationships
Perturbed By Pornography
Ask the Marriage Maven: Perturbed By Pornography
I just found out that my husband has been looking at pornographic pictures of other women on the internet. He says it's no big deal, but I don't feel comfortable with it at all. In fact, I think it's disgusting. It's hurting our relationship. Every time he's with me, I'm wondering if he's thinking about the other women. It makes me feel ugly... What can I do?
A. First of all, don't beat yourself up about it. I'm sure that you're a beautiful person, and that's the reason your husband was attracted to you in the first place. However hard it may seem, try not to compare yourself with the fantasy. There is only one you, and your husband knows it.
From your question, I take it that you've talked with your husband about his habit. That's a great first step. Unfortunately, pornography is one of the most deceptive and destructive habits facing many married couples. In fact, the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families states that "approximately 40 million people in the United States are sexually involved with the Internet." That's just a fraction of the overall porn industry. So you're not alone.
One of the best ways to get your husband to stop is to let him know exactly how you feel. You used the words "ugly" and "disgusting" with me. Have you used those exact words with him? He needs to know exactly what his habit is doing to you, your self esteem, and your view of the marriage.
Have the conversation knowing that the "battle" may not end there. Your husband may be addicted. Some signs of pornography addiction include (but are not limited to) secretive behavior, spending exorbitant amounts of time or money on the habit, and ignoring other responsibilities in order to engage in the behavior.
If you think your husband is addicted, here are some other resources that can help:
Use Unique Wedding Favors To Capture Your Personality
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Unique Wedding Favors to Capture Your Personality
A theme is very important in the process to make your
wedding distinctive from the rest. You've purchased invitations to your bridal
shower and now you need to pick out your bridal shower favors. Adorable
purse bottle stoppers are perfect wine wedding favors for any bridal
shower. Whether you are on a budget and need
cheap bridal shower favors or you're looking for something more elegant,
there is a wide variety of unique wedding favors to fit your personal
style. If you are having a dinner for your bridal shower, scented gown sachet
place card holders
make a wonderful setting for your table.
To make your wedding stand out, you want to choose the most
unique wedding favors. Beautiful butterfly, dragonfly or garden
spring wedding favors are perfect for a spring wedding. Calla lily
spring wedding favors are beautiful if you are going for a more elegant look
for your spring wedding. Flower seed packets are a great way to let your guests
know of the love that is forever growing in your hearts.
If you are going for more of a tropical or nautical theme,
beach wedding favors are the way to go to accent your summer wedding.
Whimsical flip flop candles or note pads, Adirondack chair personalized
wedding favors or beach photo glass coasters will set your reception apart
from the rest. Shells, fish, sailboats or palm trees are a few of the different
beach theme unique wedding favors that you may choose from for your
beach wedding favors. Adorable beach themed place card holders can
also set your table for your summer wedding.
If you are having more of an elegant wedding in the winter,
summer or spring, crystal or silver wedding favors or for more of a
personalized wedding favors will make your event stand out from the
rest. Stylish wine bottle stoppers come in many forms such as shells, hearts or
snowflakes for perfect silver wedding favors for your
chic wedding. Silver photo frames in many shapes are a fashionable touch to
your table for the place card holders for any reception. Silver bells
chime in a wonderful event to show the love that is new and exciting in your
There are many candle wedding favors to choose from
for a fairytale, elegant or spring themed wedding. If you are in the need of
something blue, beautiful blue candle wedding favors are perfect to add
for an exceptional touch. There are even wedding cake candles with many colors
to choose from to match your wedding's color. Adorable beach candle wedding
favors in the shape of shells or flips flops are just the thing for any
beach themed wedding in the summer whether you are having it at the beach or
just want to give the feel of the beach at your church wedding.
Stag Do Manchester Pre Wedding Fun
A fantastic bachelor party in Manchester
If the boys from Oasis are any indication Manchester must be the right place for a good time. A stag do in Manchester is the only choice if you're looking for a suave, cocky, in-your-face experience of clubbing and more clubbing.
You can find all the ingredients for the best night of your life in Manchester - from the sexy club-hopping girls to the never-ending nightlife, music scene and parade of fashionable people to the pubs, restaurants and other exciting venues. Manchester is the capital of all things trendy and in-the-know. For your next stag do consider Manchester your primary destination of choice - but only if you can handle it.
The locals know how to party the Manchester way so you'll find it easy to blend into the nightlife and have a good time everywhere you go. A large selection of pubs, bars, restaurants and other hip locations are scattered throughout the city so no one looking for a good time will be denied his right.
It may get cold up here sometimes but the fun-loving locals know how to heat things up and you'll never waste time trying to get around town. Manchester offers all the amenities, activities and excitement of big city living without the congestion and hassle of trying to move from one location to the next.
No more wasted hours trying to get wasted - everything is at your beck and call, no matter what time of day or night. Friendly smiles, faces and most importantly, girls, await you in Manchester amid a throng of entertainment choices, ranging from the sophisticated to the hip to the downright delectable.
Never run out of tasty food to eat - a wide selection of all the best in top-notch dining awaits you and your group of weary travelers, so chow down without coming up for air because the stag weekend is all about getting the most out of the experience.
Manchester has it all for your stag do or bachelor party - good food, good beer, good cheese and good girls (or bad, to suit your fancy). Trust me, if you're a red-blooded male with the instincts of your ancient, hunting and gathering ancestors, Manchester will do you just fine.
Speeches For Brothers And Sisters Of The Bride Or Groom
Attending the wedding of sister can be a lot of fun because you just get to sit back and let her soak up all the attention and love on her big day. Even if you have always been competitive, her wedding is one day where you want her to shine. Many sisters are so busy sitting back watching all of the planning for the big day that they forget that they also have something important to plan for: a sister of the bride speech. If you happen to be the maid or matron of honor you have probably thought about this, but it is also customary for the sister of the bride to give a speech and wish her sister and her new brother in law well in their new life together.
The sister of the bride speech process isn't all that difficult really; you just need to break it down. If you aren't the maid of honor you may just need to make a quick sister speech at the wedding and then you can pass on the microphone to the next family member to let them sweat a bit! Still, you should have something planned so that your nerves don't get the best of you. Your speech needn't be overly polished or cheesy if that is not your style, then again if you want to get sentimental you can!
It's a good idea to start out with formal congratulations. You can tell the bride and the groom that you were just as nervous as they were, and that you are glad that all of their hard work and planning has turned out so beautifully. Your sister may like hearing from you that things look great, and are exactly as she planned. Then, you'll want to make the speech more personal, since this is your sister that you are speaking to. If you have a story about weddings from when you were young, like how you used to share your fantasy wedding ideas with one another or something like that it will spark fond memories for your sister and share a little something with the rest of the family and friends and the reception. Personalizing the speech is important, because you aren't just that fifth cousin who was invited; you are the sister of the bride!
To close the speech you can tell your sister that you can only hope to look as beautiful as she does when you get married, if you aren't already. Also, welcome your new brother in law to the family. If you share a common sense of humor don't hesitate to make a few clean jokes and then congratulate the couple and pass the torch to the next family member so that they can express their congratulations as well.
Many sisters feel as though they need to write some prose or something to that effect for a sister of the bride speech, but that is not necessary. Of course, if you want to write a poem for the new couple, that would be great and very sincere. But, you can go casual and simply tell your sister and brother in law that you are happy for them! Since you are the sister, toast wedding congratulations and a bit more and you are off the hook. Just make it sincere and let both your sister and your brother in law know that you are happy for them, in whatever style most suits both you and them.
Advice To Keep Your Marriage Healthy
Advice for a good marriage can in some cases seem a little obvious, but in a lot of cases it can seem like just the advice you need. When you are involved in a long term relationship, sometimes it's hard to see the wood for the trees, and it takes only the most basic advice for us to see what is wrong. Check this article out for more information.
Advice for a good marriage 1
The best piece of advice is to be honest with yourself about when it is and isn't working. If you kid yourself that everything is fine when it isn't, things are hardly likely to get better-in fact you will usually notice things getting steadily worse. The sooner you spot and admit to problems, the sooner you can move past them. Half the work is done as soon as you admit something is wrong, so don't be afraid.
Advice for a good marriage 2
Learn to communicate effectively. Too often relationships degenerate into accusations and fighting as the default method of interaction. Can you honestly hope for things to last if that's how you both behave? If you have something under your skin, sit down and talk it out. Talking about things sensibly rarely makes things worse-unlike accusations and arguing!
Advice for a good marriage 3
Understand that you can't fix the problems in your marriage solely fixing your partner's behaviour. A marriage is exactly that-the joining of two people-so it's not healthy to make one person do all the changing and adapting. This will not lead to a healthy relationship. It's much better to sit and talk it out and then work out how you can both make things better for each other. It's also a lot easier this way, as each of you will usually only need to make small adjustments to keep the other happy.
Advice for a good marriage 4
Learn the difference between being in love and falling in love. When you fall in love, the person can do no wrong and people are able to behave in ways that their partner may not necessarily agree with in a normal state of mind. That's why it can take work to stay in love-the love is still there, but you can't expect to act however you please and for it to still be there. Love is like a fire, it sometimes needs to be tended to make sure it still burns.
Advice for a good marriage 5
Understand the principles of marriage karma-you get what you give, so if you go the extra yard for your partner and prove yourself to be kind, caring and considerate, the chances are they will act a lot more like that toward you too. Think about when you see couples that are really in love-it's rarely just one of them doing the kind things is it?
Hopefully this advice for a good marriage will help you out. Check out the links below for some great information on fixing your marriage for good.
Learning about your spouse's affair is one of the most life changing events you'll ever have to cope with. The initial mental and physical pain can be more than most people feel they can bear.
Debbie found that the shock left her feeling completely suicidal, in such an emotional state that she just couldn't see an end to the raging emotions of sheer loathing, humiliation, defeat and despair. She couldn't visualize surviving the infidelity.
"After weeks of trying to come to terms with the shock of my husband confessing to having an affair, I tried to face up to the news and move on with my life but I just couldn't get over the feelings of hate, shock, rage, fear and utter betrayal.
I really hated my husband, the 'other' woman and myself for what had become of our marriage. I found myself wanting to kill him one minute and trying to understand why he had done it the next. I didn't know what to do or where to turn. I had no idea as to whether I wanted to save my marriage or not but I was totally unprepared for life on my own.
I felt so alone, half dead, totally humiliated, defeated and betrayed and found I just couldn't move on without seeking help and learning that there was a way to move forward and get my life and my marriage back on track"
Because of the emotional roller coaster infidelity puts couples through, talking about the details in the early stage only reinforces the negative feelings that they already have. It will not help either the cheater or the cheated partner to cope with the situation nor will it help you move forward.
The first discussion will always be the most difficult one, when it's so easy for things to get totally out of hand. If the marriage is to be saved both partners need to be emotionally prepared, rational and calm. It is unrealistic to expect partners to be able to work together in the early days when neither party is capable of entering into any form of rational discussion.
The cheated partner will want immediate answers to why the affair occurred, if they loved the person they were having an affair with, did it mean anything and how long it had been going on. They will want to know why they weren't enough, was it the only one and will wonder if they can trust their partner again. They need to take control of these emotions before they should enter into any form of discussion and before they can make any progress towards surviving infidelity or even half way consider trying to save the marriage.
Many people go to marriage counselors terrified, not knowing what to do, unable to get the images of their partner in someone else's bed out of their mind, not knowing if their partner still loves them and feeling totally worthless and insecure. They have to get over that initial hurdle before they can move on, start piecing everything together and even consider trying to rebuild the marriage. What is said and done in those early stages is critical to surviving infidelity and will form the foundation of any new relationship which evolves.
Most people do not have the skills to work through their problems without getting emotional and cannot get beyond what has happened in the past so cannot look towards the future. It is so easy in the early discussions, when the most positive work towards recovering the relationship needs to be done, to get sucked into battles over what has happened. It is hard to push emotional feelings to one side and calmly discuss such a betrayal.
However, after the initial shock and once emotions have calmed down the most critcal thing to do is to talk, listen and try and understand what has happened, why it happened and how to move forward. Only after some kind of understanding have occurred can the cheated partner even consider any kind of foregiveness, but if initial contact is controlled, and approached in the right way, not jumping in with all guns blazing, marriages can and often do survive infidelity and become stronger because of it.
That is why spending time learning how to control your emotions and trying to understand the situation from your partner's point of view is vital if you want to save your marriage.
It is during this stage that you will find out why the affair happened, if it meant anything and what problems there were in your relationship. It is not until the all the cards have been laid on the table can couples even begin to try to put right what has gone wrong and move on with their lives.
As with most marital issues communication and understanding is critical to surviving infidelity.
How To Improve Your Marriage To Keep It Sizzling Hot
Keeping a marriage together is a task that should not be out of obligation, but should be done because of the love and respect each partner has for each other. While courtship, marriage then divorce seem to be a regular stage in a person's life, this could be totally eradicated. Being married for 3 decades or more should not be seen as triumph but a necessity.
The decision of getting married should be given multiple thinking over. Although you love a person and has deep devotion and loyalty, a lot of changes happen while inside a marriage that can change the way a person feels for one another.
The key is to keep the marriage exciting at all times. Every relationship has space for improvement. Improving your marriage is something each and every married person should strive for. If you keep your marriage from becoming predictable and monotonous you give a reason for you and your partner something to look forward to and get excited about.
Each partner should be open to changes. Learn to experiment and accept those changes. Being adventurous both in your daily activities and in the bed room will keep the relationship young. Learn to accept your partner even through his or her changes. The person you married is not the same one that he or she is now or next year and the years after. People change, and if those changes do not affect your vows try to be accepting and flexible.
Role playing can be a great idea to keep the relationship fresh. This could not be counted as cheating so do not be jealous. Although you may play games wherein you imagine the person is a different one, you still both know deep inside that it is your partner. Having an open mind can improve your marriage a whole lot.
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