Anniversary Ideas For Everyone
Are you about to celebrate a special anniversary with the one you love? Whether you have been together one year or fifty years it is important to celebrate the day in a special and memorable way. Sometimes, as much as you want to bless the one you love in a unique way, it is hard to come up with great anniversary ideas. One of the best ways to think of ideas can be to take a look back through the years of your relationship.
You will be surprised by how many perfect annivesary ideas you come up with simply by remembering special parts about the earliest parts of your time together. For instance, can you remember back to the first date the two of you shared? If so, try to recreate the date over again as a way of celebrating how far you've come. If you are still in the same city this kind of anniversary idea will be much easier to pull off.
Do you remember the first song the two of you danced to or the first film you saw together? Great anniversary ideas are sometimes as simple as renting that first film again or tracking down that old love song and dancing to it again. You will bless and probably surprise your special someone by your planning and the creativity you put into making great anniversary ideas happen.
Brainstorming other anniversary ideas can be easy when you simply think about the things that you and the one you love enjoy doing together. Consider planning a getaway weekend to an area that you have both wanted to visit. Or take your special someone on the cruise they have always wanted to go on. Be extravagant and do everything you can afford to make sure your anniversary is special. Do you love to hike and spend time in the mountains? Perhaps the best anniversary ideas for you would include a camping trip or renting out a cabin in the mountains that you love. Look for ways to incorporate things you already love to do together.
Celebrating anniversaries can be one of the best ways to keep the spark alive in your relationship. When you remember where you have been and all of the hard times that you have gotten through together it will be easy to celebrate a variety of anniversary ideas that come to your head. And perhaps the most important thing to remember as you try to gather and narrow down anniversary ideas is that in the end all that will matter is that you and the one you love get to spend quality
Phil Amoa S Doctrine On Relationships Pador
This doctrine establishes factors that if not carefully monitored will potentially lead to the destabilization of any relationship. Relationships are a bond which could be unconscious or conscious between anything or anyone including with yourself. Experience has shown that people are clueless as to what role they are to play in relationships. This article will focus on a man-woman relationship. It is everywhere you go; people crying because they have been hurt in relationships or because they are unaware of their role. The Doctrine which is presented in this text will highlight certain factors one ought to at least consider before, during and after a relationship. People enter relationships for different reasons and sometimes these contradicting reasons are the major cause for break-ups, heartache and unhealthy lifestyles. If one person is just in for fun while the other is looking for something serious then there are bound to be arguments because one partner feels that they are putting in more into the relationship.
The first factor is Communication which is the most important aspect of any relationship because you can't read every detail in your partner's mind, unless of course you are psychic. The ability to communicate effectively and efficiently can be learnt. What you need to know before you start any relationship is why you desire to be in it. If it is because you are in love, then it is probably a good enough reason, but does your future partner feel the same way? The failure to communicate why both parties are entering a relationship will only cause problems and thus lead to heartache and eventually break-up. If your partner is in just for the short term, then you are taking a risk of putting your all. Communication will always put you on the same level with your partner; it should be exercised consistently and effectively.
The PADOR considers "Have a life" an important factor. Having a life in a relationship may be tough or completely impossible when you live for the relationship and not for yourself. Living for yourself would mean that you can be happy alone and with someone else. Needing someone, feeling lonely are wrong reasons to be in a relationship because once you go into a relationship needing your partner; you become the undeniably weak link of the relationship. Also, if you decide to pursue a relationship because you are lonely, then ask yourself if you can "have a life"? When your partner doesn't make that daily-night call, you feel left alone and anger gradually builds up inside of you. You become too needy that you fail to realize they also have a life to live.
Critics of this doctrine may claim that Trust should be the first most important aspect or factor of any relationship. I agree of its importance but it is, however, not the most significant. Trust is built overtime and with candidness. In order for one to build trust, you must be able to communicate with your partner exactly what your wants and needs are and why you wanted to be with him/her.
When the trust you have invested in him/her proves futile; it will pain and that is why it is important to "have a life" because the relationship you have with yourself would support you. This doctrine has no cure for emotional problems because they can't be solved by logic. This text also does not guarantee anything; it is just a guide to keep you constantly thinking each step of the way.
Do You Have Faith In Your Partner
Faith is one of the biggest assets. Most of us have faith in God. That means that we always believe that god will help us whenever we call on him. That God will be always support us. That god loves us and wants us to grow. God will never leave us alone. This faith is the greatest strengths of many of us. What about your partner? Do you have this kind of faith in him/her?
Many will answer that I have that faith in my partner. That is good. At least they have that faith. Many of you will not be sure about the answer and quite many know that they cannot have faith in their partner. Does your partner have faith in you? Why don't you ask this question and find out the answer? Please ask him/her - Darling, suppose I have someone else in my life for a short time and then come to you and confess will our relations remain the same? Will you forgive me and forget what I did and accept me? Will we be together as we are today? The answer may differ from person to person, but you will rarely find a partner who accepts this.
As you broke his/her faith, how can you expect that their faith will remain intact? That you can expect them to support you after you betray them? That sounds difficult. Faith does not work that simply. Faith works on commitment. If you are committed to your partner and if your partner is a reliable person of integrity, you may have faith in him/her to a certain extent. To say that my partner will always be with me under all circumstances is difficult to say. Only few are lucky to have such partners.
What should we do? Draw an agreement verbally. Commit yourself fully and ask your partner to have faith in you always. Ask him/her to commit that you can have the same faith in them. Give proofs from time to time and you will win unshakeable faith of your partner. Once you have that faith, you will feel a great sense of relief because you are sure that your partner will never leave you.
Now that a sorry geek such as you has finally landed the girl of your dreams and everyone else's dreams, let's get to the hard part. The part where you keep the girl interested in you. This can also be described as the part where you end up selling your family fortunes and end up penniless, but that doesn't matter as long as you've managed to keep your girl right.
Now let us analyze the concept of a date. The origins of the word 'Date' lie in ancient Arabia, where the summers, the springs, the girls and the winters are always hot. The age old tradition of Arabia decreed that males seen going out with females had to be violently punished. Hence hanging out inside the city was a little impossible, unless the wife was ok to the idea of a thing-less husband. So what the hormone heavy kids did was, they used to go out in the desert and hang out under the shade of the date palms. The word stuck and hence we go 'dating' nowadays.
Now, your date location is highly dependent on what sort of a person you are. There's a concept in France where a huge barrel is filled with grapes and people get to stomp on them and laugh and screech and pretend to have lots of fun while doing it. If you're a extremely insecure person, I would not advise you to use this tactic because you don't want to see a hunk 'fall' on your wife/girlfriend, thrash about in the grape slush and have lots of fun while you run away crying. So for all of you insecure guys out there, please avoid such 'contact sports'-dates, or get an insecure girl who'd rather cling on to you than be clung onto. You might also want to check out the dating avenues offered by a gay bar. You'd be able to completely eliminate 'guys hitting on your girl' from the equation then, giving you 'quality' time to spend with your girl.
Now for married couples, there is an extremely radical and absolutely 'win-win' date concept you might want to explore. A date with a married couple. That way, you could gain valuable information about the joys of being married (if you get what I mean) and add to the pleasures of your married life. Worst case scenario, your wife could end up falling for the other husband, but don't worry. You shouldn't miss the trick here. You can always hit on the other wife if that happens.
Now for the hard core romantics, I suggest falling back on history for inspiration. Way back in history. I suggest going to an apple orchard and picking apples together. If you think that this idea sucks, I'd suggest you remind yourself what happened after Eve ate The Apple. Doesn't suck so much now does it?
Or if you're the rather conservative lover, you can check out the usual love spots in your locality and keep your chick entertained. Now don't ask me how to keep your chick entertained because that's your job. If I did that, she'd be my girl, not yours.
If nothing works out and your girl's getting losing interest, I recommend falling back on the 'date-under-the-date-palms' thing. A date palm's never disappointed anyone on a date. So far.
Secrets For Success In Meeting Her Parents
There is nothing as stressful and intimidating as
having to meet the parents of your girlfriend for
the first time. But, if you know how to handle
this, you will see that can be a real interesting
It comes a day in your life when you figure out
that your relationship with your girlfriend is
getting serious and she has to take you to meet
her parents and family. This is a big step in
your relationship and it is very important to
make a good impression from the beginning, if you
want that they agree to meet their girl anymore.
There are several occasions in which you can meet
her parents, such as a holiday or birthday,
picking her up for a date, or just a dinner in
family prepared special for the meeting. No
matter in which circumstances you meet, for
impressing her parents you must be prepared.
First of all, dress to impress. You must be
presentable at your meeting, that's why the best
to wear is probably a suit. Your performance will
be judged by the first impression you make in
Before the big meeting make sure to find out from
your girlfriend all the details about her family,
so you will know what to talk with them. Ask
where her parents work, about their personality
if they are very serious or they have sense of
humor, and if they like funny people or much
reserved, to know how to act with them. It is
important to know some details, to not refer to
her grandparents if you don't know if they are
Also asking questions about her family will show
her that you really care, that you are interested,
and ready to do all the sacrifices that are
necessary to make their parents like you.
Remember that in the first meeting you must make
sure that they observe your good manners, to
prove her parents that you deserve to be with
If the meeting takes place at their home, don't
forget to bring a gift, such as flowers, a box of
chocolate or a bottle of wine to show that you
are polite. Be confident, give her father a firm
handshake, and as a sign of respect call him Sir.
You have to make a good conversation, but also be
prepared for many questions towards your family.
Don't panic, relax and look in them eyes and
answer as nicely as you can. Be prepared to
answer at the question about what do you want to
do in the future. Speak about your job, family,
sports, but don't bring any discussion about
money, politics or personal questions. Asking
questions about their family will show your
interest about them, as far as your aim is to get
along with both partners, to get on their good
Keep a smiled face to show you are friendly; be
personable, polite and respectful. Flatters her
mother's look or clothing and compliment her
cooking by finishing your plate. You may offer
your help to clean up the dishes; this will
certainly impress her mother.
Be yourself, to see from the beginning how you
are, and don't show too much affection towards
your girlfriend in their presence, one kiss is
enough, to not think her parents that you are
Before you leave tell her parents that it was a
pleasure meeting them and they have a very
You will see that it will be harder with her
father which wouldn't accept easy that now it is
another man in his daughter life except him, but
if you conquered her mother you will see that she
will be the one which will invite you for dinner
and will defend you in front of her husband if
she really likes you.
So, meeting her parents can't be so bad, and if
you really success with this meeting it will base
a great friendship between you, which will have a
big positive effect on your relationship.
Quiz Your Love Is It Love Or Infatuation
You are getting attracted. You think about him/her. You want to be with your object of love. You are showing all the signs of being in love. But is it love? Or is it infatuation that will go away after some time?
Let us examine this in little more detail. What is the difference between love and infatuation? The first difference is that infatuation is short lived. It disappears soon.
How will you test it? Think about all the qualities that are making you fall in this love.
Now think of another person. Imagine that the new candidate has all the qualities in greater measure. Think deeply and imagine as much as you can. Are you still in love, or you are shifting your allegiance to the new candidate?
Take another scenario. Imagine having a bad fight with your lover. Imagine of him/her calling you different names and arguing furiously with you. Are you still in love? Will you go back next day to them? Or you already hate them?
Take this test. After many years, your beloved is losing physical charm. Pick up photographs of some movie stars when they were young and compare with the way they look now. Do something similar with your lover. Are you still in love? Will you love them after so many years when they would have lost most of their physical charm?
Love is a feeling that lasts despite years. Love can take fights in its stride. Love cannot be easily defined, but in love you care for your beloved more than yourself. You become very selfless with your true sweetheart. Do you have that feeling? If yes, it is love. Otherwise you need to think more.
Love Lies Betrayal And Deceit Why Do We Lie To Those We Love
Why do husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, lie to each other?
Our romantic relationships are seldom what they seem. We all want a relationship that is built on openness, intimacy, and trust, but the truth is, our relationships do not always work that way. More often than not, our intimate relationships involve secrecy and deceit. In fact, if you want to look for deception and betrayal in your own life, the best place to start is close to home. Husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, often lie about their true feelings for each other, the feelings they have for others, and their level of commitment. Indeed, it is safe to say that people save their biggest and most serious lies for those they love.
For better or worse, our romantic relationships are full of paradoxes which we try to overlook, downplay and ignore. For the most part, this strategy works well. Until the day comes when it doesn't, and with little warning or preparation we have to confront face-on the reality that our close relationships are not exactly what they appear to be.
Eventually, almost everyone will catch a spouse or partner in one of their lies. Inevitably, we have a difficult time coping with what we have learned and dealing with the fact that someone close has betrayed our trust. We do not expect our partners to mislead us, nor do we have insight into how and why deception occurs.
In fairness, it should also be mentioned that it is just as likely that a partner or spouse will catch you in one of your own attempts to deceive. And ironically, we are just as unprepared to deal with this kind of situation.
Ignoring the paradoxes inherent in our romantic relationships turns out to be a costly strategy and most people pay the price for this decision, unexpectedly, and all at once. It's not so much that coming to terms with the use of deception in romantic relationships will solve all of the problems you are going to encounter, but it will certainty help to reduce the stress, anxiety, and uncertainty that occur when deception eventually comes to light.
In fact, when it comes love and romance, most of the things we believe, are not true. Most people believe that all of their marital or relational problems can be solved through "communication." We believe that deception is difficult to achieve, that misleading a partner requires a lot of effort and thought, and that romantic partners can tell when a lover is lying, and so on. None of these widely held beliefs, however, are supported by the evidence. Rather, our romantic relationships are held together by a delicate balance of both candor and deceit. And both are critical to making our intimate relationships work.
In reality, romantic relationships entail two important features which allow deception to flourish: abundant opportunity, as well as the need to deceive. As we get close to another person, we intentionally and unintentionally provide them with a great deal of information about who we are, revealing ourselves through both our words and deeds. Creating this kind of intimacy or shared knowledge is critical, as it serves as the foundation for a lot of important rewards. Through our close relationships, we create gains with respect to our health, wealth, and emotional well-being.
Because relationships provide so many important rewards, it should come as no surprise that people are inclined to view their romantic partners in a positive light. We place a lot of trust in our romantic partners. We think we know them well. But while our trust surely provides us with a sense of security and comfort, it also lays the ground for deceit. For as we trust our partners more, we also become more confident but less accurate at determining when the truth is being told.
Every relevant study attests to the fact that lovers are terrible at telling when their partners are lying. In fact, detecting deception with anyone is difficult to do, but lovers manage to take this general failure to a spectacular low. Again, as we become more confident that we can tell when a lover is lying, the exact opposite turns out to be true. This "truth-bias" or "blind faith" provides the perfect opportunity for romantic partners to engage in deception. After all, who makes a better victim than someone who is eager and willing to trust everything you have to say?
Not only do close relationships create a wonderful opportunity for deception to occur, they also create the need. While romantic relationships offer many rewards, they also tend to be overly constrictive. Most everyone has felt the constraints of a close relationship from time to time; quite simply you are no longer free to do what you want, when you want, and with whom you want. So intimacy provides tremendous rewards, but at an enormous cost - the loss of your freedom and autonomy.
Lying to a romantic partner helps us deal with the constraints that our intimate relationships impose. Quite frankly, deceiving a romantic partner turns out to be the most efficient and effective way of maintaining the rewards we get from our romantic relationships while pursuing extra-relational goals and activities behind a partner's back.
How do we decide when to lie and when to tell the truth? Well, most of the time we do not intentionally think about misleading our partners. Rather such decisions are governed by our emotions and just seem to happen when the right situation presents itself. Often a sense of excitement, opportunity, and exhilaration can lead us down paths we had no intention of traveling. A sense of fear, loss, and trepidation, on the other hand, prompt us to cover-up what we've done and be more conservative in the short-term. Luckily our emotions are very good at reading situations and keeping our deceptive behavior within limits. Our emotions prompt us to regain some of our freedoms while also allowing us to maintain the benefits we get from our intimate relationships.
When you take a step back and put it altogether, the picture that emerges tends to be rather ironic. Because our romantic relationships are so rewarding yet constrictive, we are simultaneously more truthful and more deceptive with those we love. Additionally, we place the most trust in the person who is most likely to deceive us, just as we are most likely to deceive the person who loves and trusts us the most. These are just a few of the paradoxes that emerge when taking a close look at the use of deception in our romantic relationships. Most of what is uncovered runs counter to our most cherished beliefs about love and romance; that is, the idea that complete openness and intimacy are a central and defining feature of being in love.
Initially most people avoid looking for deception by a loved one. But as you begin to examine your own behavior more closely it becomes harder to dismiss the degree to which lies, betrayal, secrecy and deceit are ever present in our close relationships. Hopefully, you will take on a greater appreciation for the complexities of your relationships as well as a richer understanding of what it means to be in love. Regardless of the final outcome, taking a close look at deception in your life will change the way you view yourself and others.
Relationship Deal Breakers
In the 37 years that I have been counseling couples, I have discovered that there are only a few issues that are true relationship deal-breakers. Many of the issues that tear relationships apart are not actual deal-breakers. Rather, most divorces and breakups are the result of one or both partner's unwillingness to learn from the conflicts that exist in all primary relationships. But some conflicts and differences are actual deal-breakers.
Early in my career as a psychotherapist, I worked with Mary and Cal. Mary and Cal met when Mary was 38 and Cal was 47. Cal had been married before and had two adult children, while Mary had never been married. Cal made it very clear to Mary that he did not, under any circumstances, want more children. Mary seemed to accept this, but secretly hoped to change Cal's mind once they were married.
A year after they were married, Mary brought up the issue of having children. Cal was appalled. He felt angry, trapped and betrayed by Mary's secret hope, as well as by her dishonesty. Mary begged and pleaded, hoping Cal's love for her would soften his position. But he stayed committed to his decision not to have any more children.
This situation has a very sad ending. Mary was devastated. She loved Cal, but having children was actually extremely important to her. She didn't want to leave him and she couldn't let go of wanting a child. The stress of the situation eventually eroded her immune system and she died of ovarian cancer of few years after bringing up the baby issue.
I learned a lot from Mary and Cal's experience. I learned that the baby issue is a deal-breaker. It is not healthy for someone who really wants a baby to give that up, and it is not healthy for someone who does not want a baby to go along with having one. This deep and basic issue needs to be dealt with head-on, early in a relationship, before people move ahead with commitment and marriage.
Rhonda and Fred fell in love in their late 30's. Each had jobs that they loved and that were very important to them. Fred was the vice-president of a large company, while Rhonda had a flourishing practice as a pediatrician. They both lived in Los Angeles. All seemed fine until an incredible opportunity opened up for Fred - one that he had always dreamed of. The problem was that it meant moving to New York. Fred's work became a deal-breaker.
Some people can commute and maintain a relationship, but this was not realistic for Rhonda and Fred, since they both wanted to have children. They realized that if either of them gave up the work they loved, they would feel very resentful. They had no choice but to end the relationship. Even though they loved each other, they recognized that their relationship would soon erode if one of them gave themselves up.
Dishonesty and infidelity can often be deal-breakers, depending upon the situation. Some people can learn from and grow through these difficult situations, while for others the wound is too deep to repair.
Mandy and Hal were in their 50's when they met and fell in love. Both were in unhappy long-term marriages, which they decided to leave to be with each other.
However, Hal had married when he was very young. He had spent his life working hard to support his wife and children. He had never had an opportunity to do some of the things he really wanted to do - like travel on his own or explore relationships with other women. He loved Mandy but he felt trapped. He wanted his freedom.
As a result he started to pull away from Mandy, which was very painful for her. They received counseling to try to reconcile the situation. Mandy was willing for Hal to leave and travel for six months, but Hal was reluctant to leave Mandy. Mandy had not expected a man in his 50's to need to sow wild oats.
Then Mandy found out that Hal had slept with another woman. His pulling away was bad enough, but his infidelity was a deal-breaker. Mandy ended their relationship the day she discovered the affair. She told Hal that she still loved him but could not continue this way. She left the door open by telling him that if he ever got his wanderlust out of his system, she would consider trying again.
Dishonesty about money can also be a deal-breaker, such as finding out that your mate is earning money by selling drugs or through some other illegal operation.
Most conflicts - conflicts that are really about communication and control issues - can be resolved when both people are willing to learn. But some conflicts are true deal-breakers.
How To Prevent Your Partner From Cheating
Most of us at some point during a relationship are confronted with the issue of infidelity. This article has been written to help you prevent your partner from cheating.
The goal is to make your partner want you and not someone else. Here are 10 simple things that you can do which should keep your partner interested in you.
1. First and foremost you should try to trust your partner. This may of course not always be the easiest thing to do. But making your partner feel that you trust them, gives them the signal that you are confident. A confident person is always more interesting compared to a person who isn't.
2. Give your partner the space they need. If you let a bird fly away it is more likely to be loyal to you compared to putting it in a cage. In this situation the bird is more likely to fly back to you. However, if the bird is kept in a cage and it eventually manages to escape it is less likely to come back to you. Trying to control your partner will almost definitely lead to disaster. Give them a certain amount of freedom - but not too much. Some partners feel that an excessive amount of freedom is a sign of not caring or not being interested.
3. Whether we like it or not - we all have our insecurities. Your partner will have them too. Massage his or her ego by making compliments once in a while. The important thing though is not to over do it. If you swamp your partner with too many compliments they are either unlikely to believe you or they simply won't accept them. Someone who has severe insecurities will struggle to accept an overload of compliments because they don't actually believe they are worth it. In this situation your compliments could backfire. If the relationship is young, start off by giving the odd compliment here and there and monitor carefully how your partner reacts to them.
4. Don't over do it with gifts. By overloading your partner with an excessive amount of gifts you could be sending out the signal that you are worried they may leave you if you don't continue to buy them gifts. This could display a sign of weakness or insecurity on your part. You definately want to avoid this. Of course, surprising your partner with occasional gifts, at the right time, is the right thing to do. In fact, giving someone a present, especially if it's an earned surprise, can often be more rewarding than receiving a present. So feel free to give your partner flowers, chocolates, nice sex toys, a weekend break away, or even a voucher for a massage, etc. Just don't overdo it.
5. Keep your partner intellectually stimulated. People easily get bored if their partner lacks ideas or if they are not up to date with what is happening in the world. Bring new ideas to the table - and sometimes insist on them - even if you're partner doesn't agree. Especially if your idea means a lot to you or if you are certain that you are right. A great way of keeping your partner intellectually stimulated is to teach them something that they could not do before. This, simply put, will make you an interesting partner to be around.
6. Make an effort to look good - this ensures that you remain attractive in the eyes of your partner. Go to the gym, do yoga, go for a swim or do some other form regular physical exercise. Please bare in mind though that simply looking good is not everything. Mental attraction carries a lot more weight in a relationship compared to physical attraction.
7. Build a healthy social life outside the relationship. The things you experience when you are around other people will bring new ideas into the relationship. If you spend every day of the week with your partner you run the risk of letting you relationship go stale. This is definitely something to avoid. Keep the relationship interesting.
8. Don't fall into the routine trap. Some routine is definitely healthy in a relationship as it provides a certain amount of stability. Stability is without a doubt something we all need. However, too much routine sometimes can lead to boredom. Boredom can (not always) cause your partner to look elsewhere. Naturally this is something you want to avoid. It's important to strike a healthy balance between stability and change. Some examples of change: Introduce new foods to the relationship, don't always go to the same places on holiday, invite different people around for dinner, try a new hobby and in general - don't be frightened to be spontaneous. Doing these things demonstrates to your partner that you are not afraid of change and it displays confidence. Confidence is definitely an attractive feature.
9. Don't be too indecisive. Constant indecisiveness can be a sign of weakness. What you definitely don't want is that your partner starts to make all the decisions for you. This can lead to a partner walking all over the other person. If someone starts to do that they start to take their partner for granted. This is something that you definitely want to avoid. Although a certain amount of indecisivness can on occasion be attractive as it will give your partner a chance to take the lead. The important thing here to remember is that it should not always be the same person who is in control. Control, in a healthy relationship, is very much a shared thing.
10. Finally, on a more lighthearted note - don't forget to smile and laugh. In fact it's very important to laugh and smile in any realtionship. Smiles and laughter will transfer to your partner - and they can draw from that, especially if they are having a bad day. Smiling and laughing also is a form of showing emotions. People who are able to show emotions display a certain amount of confidence. And that can only be a good thing.
To round of my article I would like to summarise what we have just learned. The two most important things in a relationship are Trust and Confidence. Have the confidence to occasionally show resistance. Resistance reminds your partner that you are actually there and that you form an important part in the relationship. Again, dont over do it with resistance - find a healthy dose. After having read all 10 points above - dont try to introduce them all to the relationship at once. You dont want your partner to think: "Oh, whats wrong with him/her?" Introduce them slowly, one by one. As you work your way through the list you're confidence will start to grow automatically - because you will start to see signs of success and you will get the feeling that you have achieved something.
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