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Analysis What S In It For Us

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 479)
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Hand analysis and Hand reading isn't really anything dark or extremely predictive anymore. It is however not that accurate either. It is more modern, logical and almost scientific in approach today and has moved from it's ancient fortune telling roots and tendencies.Modern hand reading has evolved to something more akin to a correctional, motivational and something like a hand-holding tool which can be a great help to get your life back into perspective. It has emerged as an awesome way to introspect oneself and be able to chart out our lives in the right way, getting it back onto course ( If it went wayward, that is!).

Since it delves on what kind of person you are as it throws light upon what might be the best course of action in your life : It might tell you as to which course you must be taking up; which career might suit you better; what kind of people might you be getting along with; where you might end up in relationships; who might make a better spouse for you; what kind of person should you rather be; how you would want to break free ; your approach to problem-solving, decision making and reacting to different situations life can throw at you and a horde of other things which would have all just passed away as mere figments of thinking from an over-worked and constantly stressed mind.

Coupled with psychology, it could prove to be a powerful tool to get a thorough insight about the kind of person you really are. Not only that, it can provide professional help to people who need such help on a regular basis. If you just looked around and put your finger on the level of stress that is floating around in the corporate world today, chances are that your finger would just get burnt. In such a frenetically paced, rat-race infected, jet-age that we live in, tools like these only give the much needed respite in re-directing the entire course of your existence that is threatened to burn itself out. Family behavioural traits, how you would probably behave in different situations and such like is largely dependent on how your ancestors where and this, yet again, can be ascertained from modern hand reading.

The uses are many, but the important thing that ought to be remembered is that there is a little bit of unlearning that we might have to do when we deal with ancient subjects like these because what we believe isn't really what we see and what you see generally changes over time. If you ask as to what it can do for you, it might not be much, but then , if you really wanted to change, it can be something which you can use.

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Making A Life

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 483)
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Tom Paterson, in his book, "Living The Life You Were Meant To Live," made a very interesting comment. God isn't interested in us just making a living as He is in us "making a life." Well said! I believe a good question we can ask is are we so consumed with making a living that we have forgotten how to make a life!

In this world of "me" focus and striving to get ahead, maybe we need to take a deep breath, step back a little and get a larger perspective on life. At the end of our lives, I don't think it will really matter how much money you and I made or how successful we were. I think the questions we will be concerned about are did we love our God and others well? Did we make a difference in this world? It is not that success or money are a bad things, but Jesus was so right when he said that life was so much more than the things that we possess. At the end of our lives, I think it will be more important to know we were the kind of people that loved and served others well rather than what kind of car we drove, the house we lived in or how much money we made. Did we love with God's love and did others see in us who Jesus really is.

The reality is that there are no guarantees about time. Time is precious. It waits for no one and it's the one thing we can never get back. If we postpone what we really want to do in this life, people we want to touch or influence, or even a trip we want to take that time may never come. People wait for retirement to pursue a dream. Retirement comes and health fails and the dream never happens.

Are you making a living or making a life? Why postpone even simple joys another day? Why not take the time for a long walk and actually smell the roses and enjoy God's beautiful creation? It won't cost you a thing and will not only renew your senses but also clear your head. Why not take time to lay hold of courage and forgive or to tell someone that you love them? Maybe its time to be a voice of encouragement to someone who desperately needs a kind word or hug. Take the time to cultivate some new friendships or get together with old friends over coffee, dinner. What about the possibility of extending an act of service or kindness to a complete stranger just because you can.

Are you making a living or making a life? What a perspective! When we begin to be people of life instead of performing in life our lives can be not only meaningful but lived with no regrets!

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Double Whammy The Effects Of Procrastination

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 680)
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Procrastination, like all of your behaviours carries consequences. Whether your behaviour is conscious or unconscious, you will eventually have to deal with the effects. The effects of procrastination are something that we all have to confront and deal with from time to time. It's only natural to procrastinate at times but, the way you deal with your procrastination patterns will determine what effects procrastination has on your life.

One of the most obvious effects of procrastination is the failure to reap the rewards that would come from taking action. When you procrastinate you simple fail to take action on the very things you know will bring you the rewards that you desire. Although you know what you want and even what you need to do to get it, you still have to take action and it's usually at this point where procrastination sets in.

Because the results that you desire are often something bigger and better than what you currently have, you must step outside your comfort zone to get it. You might have to take actions that you are not comfortable with to which your unconscious mind reacts by "protecting" you against that which is uncomfortable. Although the short term effects of procrastination might seem as "positive" the long term effects are almost always negative.

Failing to reap the rewards of taking action can have many knock on effects. Taking action on your ideas and desires is one of your most empowering gifts. It is the process by which you can make the intangible tangible. Through your actions and your behaviour you create or un-create your life. It's not only the direct results of your actions that creates you outcomes, but often the very fact that you are actually consciously affecting the conditions of your life. It not just your actions, but rather your failure to take action that will have a greater effect on the rewards you reap from life. From this point of view the effects of procrastination is not just a direct but also an indirect loss of rewards. Every action is a cause set in motion that affects and build on past and future events to the point where we can never really determine the actual effect of one specific action. More than anything else, action opens you up to opportunity.

Opportunity is rarely the result of you waiting for it. When you put yourself in line with what you want most through your conscious action you expose yourself to opportunity. It's never a case of whether you have opportunities but rather are you noticing the opportunities? But even more importantly, are you using the opportunities or are you procrastinating? One thing is for certain and that is when procrastination becomes a habit you won't even notice all the opportunities on your doorstep. You will live your life in distraction, constantly looking for short term "pleasures" to avoid the real challenges that will cause you to reap the real results. You will always "turn a blind eye" to the real opportunities. Thos who succeed are rarely the people with the most or the most splendid opportunities. They are the people who saw an opportunity where no one else saw it and then they took action to realize it.

Out of all the negative effects of procrastination and indecision the failure to spot and act on opportunity is probably the saddest. So many people with so much talent fail to live up to their true potential because of procrastination. The rewards you reap from life will be either a direct or an indirect result of your actions or your inactions. Not only will procrastination prevent you from reaping the rewards but your inaction will prevent you from even being exposed to opportunity. Opportunity is knocking but you have to take action and at least open the door. Don't let the effects of procrastination stand between what you are and what you can become. As the famous entrepreneur and businessman Victor Kiam once said: "Procrastination is opportunity's assassin."

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Stop Fear Now

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 523)
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I'm convinced that fear is one of the worst things in life. Think about all of the negative ways that fear affects your life. Think about all of the decisions you make or do not make because of fear in your life. Or think about the risks that you do not take or the relationships you do not pursue because of fear. You would do well to take a good look at the fears in your life and to attempt to tackle them head first until they are no longer fears.

In my own life, identifying specific fears was the first step for me to getting over my fears. I took a few hours and made a very long list of the things I was afraid of. I included the biggest fears I had all the way down to the smallest, most insignificant fears I had. I would encourage you to take time to do the same thing. It may seem like a strange task, but just think about the freedom you can live in if you learn to overcome your fears.

I was amazed as I wrote at how many things were holding me in fear and affecting my life. One of the fears that was affecting my life the most was my fear of flying on an airplane. I knew that I was afraid to fly and I knew many other people that had a fear of flying as well, but I had never calculated the cost of that fear in my life. Only as I sat down and got honest with myself did I realize that my fear of flying had hindered me from traveling many times. I had missed out on a class reunion, a trip to Europe with my son, and a whole host of other opportunities simply because of my fear.

The process of recognizing my fears became frustrating and maddening to me as I added up all the ways that fear had stolen life and opportunities away from me. Can you think of ways that fear has hindered or kept you from living well? If so, you need to make a serious effort to stop those fears that are affecting you. If your list of fears contains any that are easy to overcome I suggest that you start today to do what it takes to overcome those fears.

Perhaps you are afraid of spending too much time alone. While this is a normal fear that many people deal with, it can steal away the comfort and relaxation that time alone can often give you. I'd suggest training yourself to be alone for small amounts of time until you can easily handle a few hours or even a day without the company of others. Try reading a book, working on your garden or doing another activity you enjoy. What freedom you will have if you can learn to be alone.

My advice to you is simple: stop fear now. Do whatever you can to stop letting fear rule your life. You will be much happier and much more free the less fear controls you.

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Controlled By Beliefs

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 661)
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Have you ever had someone attacking you and you can't figure out why?

They may say it is because of something you said, did or wrote, yet you know that it had nothing to do with them.

This happens more than we realize. And knowing how to recognize it and how to deal with it, is important in business and life. Quite often, an angry or even violent reaction from another person is due to a conflict or perceived threat with his or her inner belief system. On a fundamental level, the information or action triggered fear for their survival.

You see, when our inner beliefs are challenged, when tend to go into protection mode. It can shut down our ability to think and respond clearly. And quite often, we are not even aware of what these inner beliefs are.

Many if not most of them were developed in our childhood when we were learning how to survive and how everyone around us did things.

This is why, you can have two or more people in the identical situation and they all react differently. It's not the situation that's good or bad, it is just the viewpoint of the person experiencing it.

When we look at these beliefs, we can find that many of them no longer serve us. One destructive belief that I have seen people hold is that they can't be wrong, ever. It apparently is a death sentence to be or even appear to be wrong. So when someone else has a difference of an opinion, then it becomes about right / wrong as apposed to just being different.

I have seen people shake and go red when someone else gives a different perspective on an issue then what they thought. This is very destructive in business. It stops production, and destroys teamwork. It can cause other people to be nervous about saying or doing anything, especially if the reaction came from a boss, team leader or supervisor.

So, what do you do when some one is freaking at you?

Getting mad or shouting back rarely if ever resolves the situation. This will only escalate the situation. Neither will insulting them work, as they probably don't even know the real reason for their reaction. As far as they are concerned in that moment, it is something that you said or did.

It is important to remain as calm as possible and ask, "Why are you angry?"

The answer at first will probably be about what you said or did. Then repeat the question and ask, "But why are you really mad? What is it about this that has you so upset?"

However, there are situations where it's best to get away from the person for safety reasons. You can say that you would love to talk with them when they are calmer. It can often help to write a letter to the person, because when they are angry they are not listening anyway.

Most people don't even understand that they are reacting to something else and if given a chance; they will realize that it had little or nothing to do with the person that they are focusing their anger on.

It also helps to have a third party suggest that the person look at the real issue. Many psychologists have stated that people are never angry for the reason they think. And when they can look at it and communicate with themselves and others about it, they can then make real inroads at never being controlled by the destructive belief in the future.

Actually, we can all do this. Start noting when you are reacting instead of responding and then ask yourself, "Why do I feel strongly about this?" When we take the time to make insights into our own behaviour, we can release the control the destructive beliefs hold over us. Then we can have a happier more productive life.

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Anger And Rejections

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 724)
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Rejections are normal and we all are told no on many occasions. Some persons have difficulty handling rejections and may react hastily to the other person involved. If you walk in a bank and apply for a loan and are rejected you might stomp out the door shouting obscene talk to the lenders. This is not an appropriate way to handle the situation.

This in fact can get you in trouble and it is obvious that rejections are triggers to your emotions that enforce your anger. Now that you see this is a trigger you will need to learn how to cope with your anger and emotions. We can start with the technique to work through your anger by reducing your stress. If you are a spontaneous person then you will need to learn how to cut back on stressors. If you feel pressured in the morning before going to work, try picking out the clothes you will wear for that day the following evening.

This will provide you an extra few minutes during the morning to prepare for work. If you are running like a mad person to meet classes, then you might want to set up a schedule for your self that includes time management. This can help you learn to prepare ahead and stay on top of things without rushing. Instead of roaming thoughts through your head about what you, need to do each day, try handling one task at a time.

This works wonders once you practice and continue with your strategy. When you feel angry, try taking a few deep breaths before you speak. You may also want to practice exercising since this burns energy and often reduces your chances of exploding when your emotions are threatened. If you cannot handle rejections, coach your mind to believe that the person is not centering you out. Repeat over in your mind that no is a positive in many cases.

For example, if you are married, you enjoy going to the bar to chat with your friends, and your husband does not want you to go, and then think why he said no? Obviously, your husband cares about you since he knows that danger is potentially high at bars. He does not want you to get hurt therefore, he is saying no in your best interest. If the bank turns you down on a loan there is a legit reason. Maybe your credit report needs some repairing, or maybe they felt you income would not cover the loan amount.

Therefore, you best interest was at heart again. We all hear no throughout our lifetime and most times, it is for the best reasons. If you apply for a job and are turned down, it might be in your best interest, since the employers felt that your skills were not on the level that the job required of you. Alternatively, you may be over qualified for the job and when you are rejected, the employers are merely saying we do not have the cash to pay you for what you are worth. Thinking positive is always great for managing anger.

If you are prompt to explode when your emotions are interrupted then it is difficulty to manage your life. If you are angry most likely, all areas of your life seem like an uphill travel. When you gain control this often benefits everyone, including your self. Your life starts to improve and your mind is thanking you for removing stress from its cavity. If you are prone to beat your self up when rejections come your way, you might want to find a positive side of your being and enforce it in your mind repeatedly.

Practice makes perfect and this is a great way to train your mind so that you gain control of your mind and anger. If you are frustrated easily, it is probably because you do not take time out of a day for your self to relax. There is nothing wrong with relaxing. Therefore you can sit down for 30 minutes each day and yoga or think of nothing at all. Finally, we are closing so I wanted to let you know that once you practice the strategies for dealing with anger, pat your self on the back each time you make effort and achieve.

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Reboot Your Commute

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 448)
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Commuting is one of those things that, if you are doing it, is something that you have to do rather than want to do. And if you have a negative attitude about your commute, it can quickly turn into something that starts to impact more than just the time you spend commuting.

Your attitude about the commute can carry into work, home, and play. When you arrive at work already in an agitated state, you'll need a cooling off period or your productivity will be lowered. Time is wasted preparing for the commute itself, either by having to hype yourself up or by dragging yourself down. It can also take its toll of your health, whether it is from increased stress or weight gain. Needless to say, commuting takes away from time that you would rather spend on other activities.

Wouldn't it be nice if you actually looked forward to your commute? It may seem overwhelming to try to picture the commute in a different way, but there are resources out there to help commuters change their perspective and even turn the commute into something positive and productive.

Following a simple program and making small changes is a great way to start turning your commute into a better experience. Programs are good because they provide structure and activities to see you through the needed steps and help you to understand

why the commute affects you adversely and how to change it.

One of the first things to do is think about what it is that drains you about the commute? Is it the time, the crowds, being away from home, fears and risks associated with traveling, or simply the boredom? In order to revert back to a time before the stress of the commute got hold of you, you first need to articulate what about the commute is draining. Then you need to do something about it.

Think of the commute as a tool that allows you to live your life in a better way. For example, instead of saying:

"I hate driving all the way to work. I wish I could retire. What's the use of having a nice house when I don't have any time to spend in it?"

You could say: "I commute to work so that I may live where I choose. In this way, I get the best of both worlds, a good paycheck and a good home. I even get to use my commute time in a way that increases my health and wellbeing."

Figure out what drains you, then you can act on that and move forward to help make your commute a positive force in your life.

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You Should Really Get A Life

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 688)
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Anxiety: A state of apprehension, uncertainty, and fear resulting from the anticipation of a realistic or fantasized threatening event or situation, often impairing physical and psychological functioning.

You could also say that anxiety is a function of what Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City aptly describes as 'shoulding'. The 'realistic or fantasized threatening event or situation' comes about because we want something to be contrary to the reality of the situation. It is no wonder I find myself in a constant state of anxiety. I 'should' all over every single aspect of my life, from daily occurrences, to how everything else in my life 'should' be. It's quite pathetic really. The slightest non-event can ruin my day due to my resistance in accepting what is so at that point of time.

Take this morning for example. I decided to catch a bus to work rather than taking the train, believing a more direct route to work would save an annoying train line change at central station. What I didn't take into consideration, however, were the frequency of the bus stops in the middle of peak hour traffic, making the journey to work much longer than the simple 10 minute wait between train rides. I was going to be late. Really late. All of a sudden my mind went into 'it shouldn't be this way' mode, and I was performing the silent angry dance (mental trashing of everything) every time the bus stopped. I'd curse the passengers who held me up because they'd buy their ticket from the driver instead of holding a prepaid one (even though I did the same thing when I got on the bus), until eventually my 'shoulding' went into overdrive: "I should have recharged my phone so I could call the office", "I shouldn't have taken so long to get ready", "There shouldn't be so many bus stops! Didn't we just stop, like, 100 metres back?" "There should be a bus lane", "I'm so irresponsible!" and on and on and on and on...this futile mind activity proceeded to develop into a full-blown anxiety attack. And for what? Being 20 minutes late for work? Ma vaffanculo!

And then there are the broader aspects of 'shoulding' that persist on a daily basis. This ranges from my physical appearance (I should be taller, have smaller bones, thicker hair, and darker, smoother skin), my age (I should be further into my career by now, own a home by now, have saved $20 grand by now, know more stuff by now, be married with children by now), my family (they should be more together, more educated, and more loving and supportive of me), and everything else you can think if. It's never perfect, and there is ALWAYS something to fix.

What would it take to give this 'shoulding' up for good? Firstly, I need to look at the impact 'shoulding' has on my life. 'Shoulding' in actual fact means that I don't have a life. If I don't accept the way everything is, from my hair to my bank balance, and take real responsibility for it, really own it, then I'm not really living, because I'm never really present. Life only exists in the here and now. The past only exists in memory and the future doesn't exist at all. So 'shoulding' takes us out of life because it is not related to reality at all. It is not 'what's so right now'. The sooner I accept what is so, the sooner I come back to, well, life!

I believe it to be as simple as that. Life shouldn't be any other way just because it isn't any other way.

Right now I'm 'shoulding' about what I've just written. I'm telling myself it should be funnier, and sound less like Dr Phil. But do you know what? What is even more important to me right now is that I express my experience living in the world of should, with the hope you can relate to what I've just said, and maybe even get something out of it.

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Improve Memory Tips

(category: Self-Improvement, Word count: 537)
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This article will review the use and potential of using mnemonics tactics to increase and improve memory capabilities and better memory in general. In many studies it has been shown that mnemonics have three fundamental principles underlying the use of mnemonics are imagination, association and location. By using mnemonics there is a good chance of improving your memory. These three principals, association, imagination and location can be brought to work together, and you can use these principles to generate powerful mnemonic systems.

Working together, the principals of association, imagination and location can be used to generate powerful mnemonic systems. Hopefully once you have absorbed and applied these techniques you will understand how to design and apply these principles to your own field to design your own powerful, sophisticated recall systems. Lets start by a short review of the principals involved.

Association is the method by which you link a thing to be remembered to a method of remembering it. Although association techniques are different and use the same principals, you should try and use what you know works best for you, thus it is suggested that you implant your own associations rather than adopting a foreign system. You can you association by doing these following things; tying or linking a thing to be placed on top of the associated object, penetrating into each other, Merging together, Wrapping around each other, Rotating around each other or dancing together, Being attached to the same color, smell, shape, or feeling

Imagination in memory is used to create the links and associations needed to create effective memory techniques, imagination is the way in which you use your mind to create the links that have the most meaning for you. There is a natural difference between people since images that created will have less power and impact on you, because they reflect the way in which we think. The more strongly you imagine and visualize a situation, the more effectively it will stick in your mind for later recall. Mnemonic imagination can be as violent, vivid, or sensual as you like, as long as it helps you to remember what needs to be remembered.

The third principal and the last one is location. Location provides you with two things: a coherent context, this means that you have a context into which information can be placed so that it hangs together, and a way of separating one mnemonic from another: e.g. by setting one mnemonic in one bus seat, I can separate it from a similar mnemonic located in the back of the same bus. Location spices up your memory and provides context and texture to your mnemonics, and protects and prevents them from being confused with similar mnemonics. Setting one mnemonic with visualizations in the stadium in Milan, Italy and another similar mnemonic with images of a stadium in London, England allows us to separate them with no danger of confusion.

So using the three fundamentals of Association, Imagination and Location you can design images that strongly link things with the links between themselves and other things, in a context that allows you to recall those images in a way that does not conflict with other images and associations.

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