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Paying Attention

(category: Success, Word count: 475)
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Being a spiritual teacher has continually frightened me. Not because I don't want to do it but that I don't feel adequate for the job. And yet, the role unwittingly is engaged by me as I seek out truths for our lives, who we are, what we're here to do, and other such questions.

The biggest problem is that while it may be easy to tell someone what to do, we can often times recognize that doing it ourselves is not always so easy. This can be a good thing though for the teacher to experience. It permits the student the luxury of receiving compassion from a teacher who understands the difficulties that this quest will involve.

As I wondered today about some simple events leading to these thoughts, I found myself querying the lack of progress in my life in the past. What came up was, "Have I been paying attention?" I realized immediately that a significant part of the problem was that I had not been paying enough attention. For that matter, I think most of us don't pay enough attention.

Paying attention to what? Good question to ask. I don't think that we pay enough attention to ourselves. We're so busy trying to do something, prepare for something, get ready for something, compete for something, to get ahead, to fit in, be a part of the crowd, wondering what other people think, that we forget to pay attention to the most important person in our life: Our own Self. How do you do that?

Oh... good question! Really good question! How do you pay attention to your own self? Well, I have noticed that when I stopped trying so hard and slowed down long enough to pay attention, I began to notice something extraordinary going on in my mind. Yes, many conversations happening within the creative mind: Interesting, conflicting, fearful, worrying, funny, fantastical conversations with two to three sides. Ever notice that? I'm sure you have.

Here's the real kicker. When you can notice all these internal conversations that you're having with yourself, try to notice the quiet one. There is another part of self that sits and watches all this crap going on and around "itself" inside your mind. Who do you think that quiet one is? Really? Who?

That's the spiritual you. The one that wishes you'd stop bickering with your self, your life, and stop listening to all the crap the outside world fed you. That is the one that wants you to trust you - that quiet you - the one that knows who you are and what you are here for. Have you learned to trust that quiet one? We always seem to pay much more attention to the noisy shouters in our minds. I challenge you to pay closer attention to the real you.

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Isn T It Time For You To Change Your Belief Systems

(category: Success, Word count: 596)
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The Importance Of Belief Systems

I remember when I first started learning about what it took to become successful, and began studying the people who were a success. One of the first things I noticed was that rich people often started out just like any other normal person.

They did not necessarily come from rich families, or have a good education. However one thing they did have was a belief system that supported their dreams. In this article I am going to examine our psychological belief systems, and why they are important in achieving success in life.

So What Exactly Is A Belief System Anyway?

Well put simply, belief systems are things that you regard to be true, or you believe to occur in a particular way. For example, one belief system could be that only lucky people become successful.

These beliefs then edit your reality, by acting like filters in the brain. The world you see around you then becomes shaped by these beliefs. So your beliefs therefore have a big effect on how you act, and the things you believe that you can do.

How Do Belief Systems Form?

When you are born, you arrive into the world with no beliefs. You have no idea how it works, or what is possible, and so you have no filters in the brain. At this point you believe anything is possible, which is why children have such wild imaginations.

However because we have no beliefs, we have to learn them from someone. And because as children we spend most of the time with our parents, our beliefs first come from them.

This means that eventually as we grow older we begin to adopt a mixture of our mothers and fathers beliefs as to how the world works, and what is possible or impossible to do. Sometimes these can be good beliefs, and sometimes these can be limiting bad beliefs.

Self Belief

So, for example, your parents may have been very optimistic people and believed anything was possible if you really wanted it. When you grew older there would be a strong chance you will also have this belief, and have the same optimistic outlook on life.

Alternatively, your parents could have had very limiting beliefs. They told you that life was hard and nobody except the rich make it in life. You will then adopt this belief and that's how you live your adult life.

Other Sources Of Beliefs

Another major source that forms belief systems in children is school. For example. One common belief told to children is that if they don't do well at school, and get high grades, then they will never be successful in life.

But if you look at who becomes successful, most highly successful people didn't get good grades at school, and a large percentage of them dropped out early. So obviously this belief isn't true. But for the people who don't get good grades and then adopt this limiting belief system, it will most likely limit what they believe they can and ultimately will achieve.

Changing Your Belief Systems

So beliefs have a massive influence on our life and effect not only how we perceive the world, but also how we act in it. However whilst our beliefs may be formed during our childhood, this does not necessarily mean beliefs can't be changed. This is why identifying and removing limiting belief systems is so important, as it could quite literally change your life.

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Success Lessons From Cricket

(category: Success, Word count: 1408)
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The first success lesson is that you and I must not dwell on our mistakes however humiliating they are. We have to be tough minded and just focus on the next ball to be bowled or the next project in our lives.

Cricket is a team game but there are only 11 players fielding (bowling and catching the ball) and they are spread out on a large field. Any mistakes you make are seen at once by your team mates and the audience. The mistakes of the batting side are also clearly visible as only two people bat at a time.

Kevin Pietersen, the promising England batsman, dropped two catches in the first test when he was fielding but then went on to a play a good batsman's innings. A commentator remarked that he must have a strong mind to get over the disappointment of dropping the catches enough to allow him to bat well

Geraint Jones, the wicket keeper, had also dropped two catches and again a commentator remarked that you can try to put your mistakes at the back of your mind but it is not that easy. The memory keeps recurring. However, Jones batted well in spite of the memory that must have haunted him. Later in the series, he also took some magnificent catches to make up for the ones he had dropped.

Both captains, Michael Vaughan and Ricky Ponting, batted poorly in the first two tests and were heavily criticized in the papers. However, in the third test match both captains batted extraordinarily well. They both showed the fighting spirit to get over the depression they must have felt after the first and second matches and the criticism they were receiving daily.

A second key success lesson is that you must not get distracted from your goal of scoring runs or anything else by mental or physical pain. In ordinary life, many painful things can happen which can demoralise you unless you are determined enough to keep going in spite of the pain. Keep focused on your goals and dreams whatever happens.

Those who have not played cricket may not realise how hard a cricket ball is. It is especially hard and bouncy when it is new. Fast bowlers are usually given the new ball so that they can bounce it high to hit the batsmen in the head, throat, ribs or hands.

Once the batsmen get distracted by the pain in their head or hands, they will be vulnerable to the next ball and will do something silly like knocking up a catch or failing to protect their wicket (the three stumps or sticks protruding from the ground) from getting hit by the ball.

Brett Lee, the Australian fast bowler, was run out when he hesitated before running. He wanted to flap his hand to get rid of the pain. His index finger and then his thumb had been hit by fast balls. Later, however, in another match, he redeemed himself by batting well even though he had been hit hard on the head and the arm!

On the second day of the first test England were bowling at the Australians who were having their second innings (chance to bat).

However, the England bowlers were not harassing the batsmen enough. Boycott, the former great England batsman, commented that the ball should be whistling about the batsmen's ears and hitting their gloves:

"The ball is new and hard. Now is the time to hit the batsmen before the ball gets too soft. Once the batsmen get too comfortable, they will start thinking: 'I fancy scoring a hundred.'"

Even the tailenders or weaker batsmen who bat last have to suffer. The bowlers cannot allow them to stay in too long. Boycott continues:

"Bowlers should hit the tailenders in the ribs or on the hand before they get too comfortable. That's what you have to do as a fast bowler. You have to hurt the opposition tailenders. Tailenders are alright if there is not a likelihood of them getting hurt. They're not too brave."

On Saturday, the third day of the test, the Australian tail enders were batting. Gillespie, one of the tailenders, was hit in the stomach near the belly button. He grimaced in pain. A few balls later he was hit in the groin by a ball from Harmison and doubled over in agony. The ball was travelling at about 90 miles an hour. The crowd roared with laughter. Harmison had been aiming for the throat and the toes and the crown jewels

It can take a good over (6 balls from the same bowler) or two to get focused after being hurt. But Gillespie is a gutsy player and practises hard at his batting. He realizes it is important for a tailender to score runs or at least stay in. He batted on bravely.

The gutsy performance of the Australian tailenders had much to do with the Australian success in the first test match of the Ashes series. They had learned how to overcome sharp physical pain and recover their focus quickly.

We all need to learn to accept the fact that we will suffer mental and physical pain at some point in achieving our goals. The secret is to forget the pain as quickly as possible and just concentrate on doing what we have to do.

Further success lessons came from the third test match. One of them is that sometimes it is better not to listen to the critics whether they are outside or inside your own head.

Australia had won the first test match and then England won the second test on the 7th Aug 2005 a date that will go down in history as the date of one of the greatest cricket matches ever played.

England won the match by 2 runs only - an amazingly close margin. Much of the success was due to the England captain, Michael Vaughan, but Vaughan had not scored enough runs himself in this test or the first one. He could guarantee that the papers would be having a go at him in a big way. His solution was simple. He did not read the papers.

On Thursday, England went in to bat. Michael Vaughan was in third and was under great pressure to perform. This is where his policy of not reading the papers paid off. He scored his first century of the series. The audience were up and out of their seats applauding as he succeeded. He had scored 13 fours (hits to the boundary).

A captain who scores runs can lead by example. It is important that he is in form as actions speak much louder than words. In the end he made a large total of 166 runs with about 20 four's and at least one six (a hit over the boundary).

He told an interviewer that before batting he had talked to the young boy who was the England mascot for the day. The lad had already had three heart by pass operations. This made Vaughan feel less tension as he realised that, at the age of thirty, he had so much to be thankful for and that scoring or not scoring runs was not that important in the whole scheme of things.

He also decided to bat on intuition and not to think too much. He had already done his thinking and his practice. Once he was facing some of the best bowlers in the world, he would not have time to think. His plan worked and he smashed the ball all over the place.

However, in the end Australia held out for a draw. They were saved mainly by the rain which meant that England had less time to get them out than was necessary.

So then: keep going even if you make embarrassing mistakes in full public view. Regain your focus on your goals even if you have been hit by physical or mental pain. Even the great Jim Rohn lost a million dollars after he had signed a form without realising the liabilities involved. He soon regained his focus and the lost money. Refuse to fill your mind with the views of your critics and keep your life in perspective by thinking of those millions of people who are so much worse off than you. Finally,once your thinking has been done, take action wholeheartedly without worrying about the results.

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Self Growth Building Character And Integrity

(category: Success, Word count: 942)
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It's been said that character is defined by what you do when you think no one is watching. What an illuminating concept that is.

Most of us have a public face and a private face. There are parts of ourselves we don't want the world to see. Typically, we tend to hide the aspects that would not be viewed favorably by society. Greed, lust, jealousy, pettiness, fear and so on. We also tend to hide our weaknesses. No one needs to know that we can wolf down a gallon of ice cream in an hour, do they?

I think most people are "good" at their core; decent, loving, compassionate and kind. However, even those we perceive to be good people are capable of unspeakable acts. How many times have you heard a convicted murderer's family member or friend say, "I just can't believe he would be capable of something like that. It's so unlike him." The killer projected one identity to the world, while secretly he was someone else entirely.

Okay, most of us are not murderers. Yet, even those of us who would be considered "good people" often think nothing of stealing, cheating on our spouses, or worse. What does that say about our character? Is it wrong only if we get caught?

How many times have you done something that you probably wouldn't have done if others had been there to see it? Would you feel embarrassed if these things were brought to public awareness? Did you act on your impulses only because you felt sure no one would ever find out?

I've been thinking a lot about the concept of "sin" lately. What is sin exactly? In the Christian religion, sin refers to that which displeases (or dishonors) God. The Ten Commandments warn us against adultery, theft, murder and more. Supposedly if you follow that list, you will remain in God's good graces.

In some earth religions, there is only one commandment: Harm None; which basically covers all angles in two words. Do nothing that would cause harm to yourself or another. Seems simple enough.

Yet, in both of these examples there are gray areas, aren't there? Sometimes it's hard to tell what's right or wrong. If we find money on the street and pick it up, is that stealing? Does it make a difference if it was $5.00 or $500.00? If we lie to protect someone's feelings, is that wrong? If we take some paper clips home from the office, is that stealing? Does it "harm" the company, really? If we flirt with someone other than our spouse, or fantasize about them, is that cheating? Or is cheating only the physical act of sexual intercourse?

In situations like these, how do we know the right course of action? How do we balance integrity with our impulses and desires? I think it can help to examine your motives and the possible consequences. What is your intent in this situation? What do you hope to gain from it? Could your actions harm another, or yourself? If your actions became public knowledge, would you be okay with that?

Maybe some of you are rolling your eyes at me right now, thinking, "What's the big deal? So what if I take a few things from work, or cheat on my wife? What they don't know won't hurt them." That may be true, but doesn't it hurt you in the long run? Don't those actions detract from the kind of person you are? Don't they dim your inner light? If it's true that we are all connected, then isn't it also true that harming another means harming ourselves? By disrespecting others, we disrespect ourselves and God.

Personally, I don't believe that God is angry and judgmental, sitting up in the clouds waiting to cast us into the pits of Hell for our transgressions. I do believe there will be a final "review" of our lives, and we will have to answer for the things we've done. But I think we will be our own judges. In the deepest part of ourselves, we know right from wrong.

We're not perfect, and no one is expecting us to be. We all make mistakes and do things we are later ashamed of. We are human, after all. But there is a big difference between making a mistake, and purposely doing something we know is wrong. We may try to fool ourselves at times and justify our actions. Maybe your husband doesn't pay attention to you, so you try to convince yourself that it's okay to have an affair with a man who does. Or your employer gives you a crappy raise, so you decide to make up for it in other ways, like stealing supplies or fudging your time sheet. They asked for it, right? You certainly have the right to do these things, and probably no one will stop you. Our greatest gift in life is Free Will. Unfortunately, it is also often our greatest curse. There are always consequences to our actions, whether they come now or later.

In the end, it's all a matter of personal accountability. Do we want to be a person of character, or not? It doesn't matter if we get caught or not. What matters is that we are defined by our actions. If I take something that doesn't belong to me, I am a thief. If I cheat on my spouse, I am an adultress. If I don't want to get caught, I probably shouldn't do these things in the first place. The truth has a way of making itself known.

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Types Of Self Defeating Communication

(category: Success, Word count: 200)
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If there was a law against people verbally abusing themselves, it would be a safe bet that most Americans would now be in jail. The things we say to ourselves both silently and out loud are amazing! And we say these things to ourselves almost constantly. For example, how many times have you found yourself making derogatory remarks about how you reacted to a situation you have just experienced? We tend to judge and invalidate our actions when they are out of sync with our beliefs about what is right and wrong or good and bad.

If you are like the average person in our society, I suspect that you make such self-deprecating statements all too frequently. Likewise, I strongly suspect that the frequency with which you verbally abuse yourself about goals detracts significantly from your results.

I have good reason for both suspicions. First, it is common knowledge that people talk to themselves when involved with certain tasks. Salespeople talk to themselves before meeting a client, lawyers talk to themselves about judges and jurors and musicians talk to themselves about the requirements of a piece they will play. Butcher, baker, or candlestick maker

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The Impossible Dream

(category: Success, Word count: 367)
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The 72,500 men, women and children sat in an uncomfortable silence, no one daring to cough, no one daring to speak, each one focussed on the young 27 year old. Each one knowing, this was the start of the impossible dream. The dream they had had for 27 years. A dream they had dreamed every year of this boy's life. Now it could become reality. Now it was possible.

And then: failure. The dream was dashed. The young man had missed the first opportunity to put their team ahead in the annual battle against an old enemy. He missed a sitter was the gasp around the crowd. Men turned to friends and compatriots and said, "We're going to lose again". "How long do we have to wait?"

Some wiped a tear away. The game has already restarted. There was a heavy feeling amongst the crowd.

The kicking king had missed what he would consider to be a sitter. As he looked up he saw the ball wasn't going straight. He had miscued. He had missed the opportunity to calm the crowd, his team mates and put the opposition on the back foot.

His reaction was not that of defeat or self flagellation instead he reminded himself:

It's all about the method. The process.

Kicking a penalty in an international match is the same as in practice. The same rules apply as on the training ground. It's all about the method, the process. Not the outcome.

"Concentrate on the process". Concentrate on the method of taking the kick. Concentrate on the formula. Place your non kicking foot in the right place. Swing your leg the same way as you always do. Make contact in the same manner. Follow through as you have always done. If you keep using the correct method, the correct process, then success will naturally follow.

Stephen Jones knows that the process is the key to success and he went on to kick many goals in that match and fulfil the dreams of a nation.

What about you?

To reach your goals, your dreams do you focus on the outcome or the method, the process?

Good Luck

www.desktop-meditation.com

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How To Activate Your Personal Success

(category: Success, Word count: 247)
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What do I mean by Activating Your Personal Success?

As I've outlined in my book Awaken the Genius each one of us possesses inherent skills, abilities and resources. Skills are obvious these are things that you do better than everyone else around you, or at least as well. Abilities could be physical or mental in nature. Some people have the ability to do math, others have the ability to do art, as examples. Resources are our inner ability to handle and manage situations. A resource would be the skill to be patient when outside influences seem to be slow or difficult. Another resource might be the ability to transform anger into flexibility.

With hypnosis you learn how to cultivate these inner resources that are at the core of who and what you are. At Positive Changes we believe that you are far greater than you have been lead to believe. Far more capable that you have yet allowed yourself to become.

You have started a journey into the world of self-mastery. That journey is to develop who and what you are at the greatest possible level. I believe we all have a internal blueprint. A blueprint that was there when you were born. This blueprint represents your true potential.

How was your success blueprint developed? Psychologists have determined that only 15% of your knowledge is in technical training and the balance of 85% is represented in the personal qualities such as:

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Achieve Your Goals Through The Magic Of Consistency

(category: Success, Word count: 991)
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Consistency seems to be a boring idea at first sight. It lacks glamour and excitement. But, when you look more closely, consistency is anything but boring. It contains the secret of achievement and success. It is the key to an almost magical power than can transform lives.

Consistency means repeating the same behaviors regularly and without exceptions. Consistent behavior is the opposite of erratic behavior. Skipping workouts is an example of erratic behavior. Performing all or most of your workouts is an example of consistency.

Consistency creates powerful habits; lack of consistency and exceptions mean that you have to start building the habits all over again.

Consistency allows the seeds to grow and the fruit to arrive. Regular, patient, consistent action is necessary to achieve good results. Even winning the lottery requires buying a ticket and entering the numbers.

A woman who won the US $162 million lottery is quoted as saying, that she played the same numbers consistently for two years. She didn't play it once or twice and give up as so may people do.

She steadfastly believed that her dream of winning the lottery would be realized. Consistency, then, may occasionally work even in the notoriously risky world of gambling.

Recently, I read an outstanding article by T.J. Walker, the public speaking and communication expert. He commented on how often communication breaks down on the internet because of a lack of consistency.

Ezines, blogs and podcasts often only last for one or two issues and then they disappear. Either their creators ran out of material or foolishly expected success after one or two efforts and gave up when the results of their efforts were disappointing.

Most marketing gurus insist that sales only come after about seven email messages have been sent to a list of potential customers.

Many would be entrepreneurs lack the patience and consistency to send out even seven messages to their lists. They are unlikely to succeed in winning the trust of their customers.

Nearly any goal worth achieving demands regular and consistent efforts. If you want to achieve a black belt in a martial art, you need to show up to one training session after another whether you feel like it or not.

I know, from many years of experience, that students who show up regularly for training almost always achieve their goal of becoming a black belt.

However, I have had some very talented students who lacked patience and only showed up sporadically. When their progress up the ladder of success seemed too slow to them, they gave up and disappeared.

When I examine my martial arts students at grading sessions, I often congratulate them for just being there. I tell them that they are already half way through the grading because they have shown up and in the famous words of Woody Allen: "80% of success in life is just showing up."

By showing up, my students have shown that they have guts and are willing to accept the fact that they might look foolish if they forget their syllabus or perform it badly. Not every one can face this possibility and I even had one student give up the martial art because the grading seemed too worrying.

One person who has never failed to show up in the UK and about a third of the rest of the world is Queen Elizabeth II. For over half a century she has shown up at one formal and informal occasion after another in good and bad times. She has traveled thousands of miles around the world to achieve her goal of being a servant of her country and the commonwealth.

Today was her 80th birthday and most of the country and even the media showed their appreciation for her consistent adherence to duty. One paper actually called her "Elizabeth the Great".

Greatness only comes when efforts are consistent. Champion teams win championships not because they win every match but because they consistently play well and with determination and, as a result, win most of their matches.

An individual loses weight because they stick consistently to their diet and to their exercise regime. A body builder adds muscle weight because he consistently attends the gym whether he feels like it or not. The champions do not give up when they feel tired or bored or when results seem painfully slow.

Daily efforts create habits and habits make it easier to make those daily efforts but it still takes hard work and the determination to follow through every single day no matter what.

To achieve your goals repeat your efforts every single day. Turn up in the gym or wherever you need to. Don't be like my step brother who was once told: "You won't turn up for your own funeral!"

Occasionally you make have to make an exception and miss out on the desired behavior. One way to avoid exceptions is to perform the behavior you have planned as early as possible in the day before the rest of the family and the cat start demanding your attention!

Another way to avoid exceptions is to make a list of your most important daily behaviors in order of importance. Stick it on your wall and read it as soon as you get up. This way, your consistency will not falter because of a poor memory.

Repeat the desired or planned behavior daily and with as few exceptions as possible and you will make gradual but certain progress and eventually achieve your loftiest goals and dreams.

Even if you don't achieve all your goals and dreams, you will have at least become a great character and a person of value because you did what you planned to do on a daily basis. That, at least, is a goal worth achieving.

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Can Vs Can T

(category: Success, Word count: 449)
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It is my personal opinion that there are two words that are the driving force behind your personally achieving your ultimate outcome and your WHY in Life. These two words are the most powerful words that you can and will ever speak to yourself about any situation - "CAN" and "CAN'T" As I've said many times, "CAN" is a word of power; whereas, "CAN'T" is a word of retreat.

You have the power to decide if you wish to ACHIEVE or RETREAT, because when you speak victory words such as "I CAN", you will attain whatever you set out to do regardless of what others are saying to you. There are many famous entrepreneurs in the world such as Ray Kroc, Fred Astaire, Walt Disney and Dick Clark. I can attest to the fact that if you spoke with each of them individually, they would tell you that in the beginning of their journey the majority of people told them --you CAN'T do that! Fortunately, they disregarded these statements and listened to their inner voice, who said, "Oh yes I CAN!"

The key in life is to realize the most important person who speaks to you every day is you on the inside! You need to review your WHY in Life and see if your are on track toward achieving your WHY, or are you on a detour because someone told you, "You CAN'T do that so stop dreaming and just forget about it!" As a personal mindset builder, you need to speak to your inner person and say to yourself, "Today I will take another productive stride!"

Each morning, I visualize myself winning. My personal outcome for each day is to build a community of people who we can inspire and motivate all of us to make the world a better place in which to live. I have to admit if it was not for my inner person saying, "John you CAN do it! YOU CAN do it!" I may not be in the position of success that I am today. Some days it is still difficult, but guess what - we ARE doing it!

I am personally very proud and appreciative of the people who have stepped up to the plate and made individual contributions of talent and time and when combined have made an empowered team at the Di Lemme Development Group - a team that keeps on building each day!

In summary, you need to ask yourself a very honest question, "Am I listening to my victory words from the inside or am letting the outer defeat (loser) words control my outcome in life?".

Find Your Why & Fly,

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